notice, and thanks to Rain, Alchan’s control was loosening in unacceptable ways. Finally, there was a female he could have and claim, who wouldn’t get snappy with him, wouldn’t test his will. There would be no need for violence because she didn’t have that level of fight in her.
As that thought entered his mind, Alchan broke out in a cold sweat. All he could do was try to ignore it. He could live through this if he didn’t indulge it.
Thank the Skies for Mave. She’ll stop me. If anything happens, I can trust her to stop me.
A knock made him look up to Seanev in the doorframe.
“We have a meeting,” Alchan said, sighing. He wasn’t in the right place for this meeting, not after the morning he’d had and the obscene things running through his mind. “Come in.”
“Have you eaten?” the male asked softly. “You often forgot to during the War. Hertesh and I would have to force you and Luykas to sit down and eat.”
“I’ve gotten better at eating while I work. He and I just had our midday meal.” Alchan understood what Seanev was trying to do, and in a sense, it worked.
Alchan could remember the times when Seanev was one of his closest friends. Luykas and Alchan had worked alongside General Lorren for so long, they had become his sons as much as Seanev and Hertesh were. Before Alchan and Luykas had risen through the ranks and earned their reputations, the two Lorren sons were often considered as Javon’s heirs. They still were because Alchan couldn’t just be a military leader anymore. He had to be his grandmother’s heir. Luykas needed to be even more—a spymaster, a general with no army, and a prince, whenever that was necessary.
Thoughts of the past helped Alchan slowly move past thoughts of Rain and Lady Lilliana. He was certain Seanev had no idea what he was thinking about, but the warrior had helped him in more ways than one. Alchan’s mind cleared in the silence that followed his answer, and he was grateful. He needed to be a king now, not an uncontrollable bedru.
“Good, good,” Seanev said softly.
“You wanted to have a private meeting with me before another meeting. What is it?” Alchan looked at the intelligent commander and saw the sad brother and the last, lonely son of greatness—all of them applied. Alchan had been all of them many times in his own life. He’d changed, though. Only a few years ago, he might not have seen with as much clarity, which was the secret skill of those who ruled. They had to see everything, even if it was uncomfortable to look in a mirror because a ruler’s people were his or her mirror.
Alchan didn’t just see the ethereal, though. He saw the physical, and the bandage on his general’s arm was a problem.
“I…” Seanev trailed off, bringing a hand up to his mouth, rubbing his jaw in thought. “I wanted to apologize for Lilliana. In private, just me and you. I needed to…”
“Try to justify it?” Alchan said, a growl rumbling in his chest at the mention of the ahren now living in his house and unintentionally eroding his control over himself. He was angry, but not at her. No, he was angry for her. He was angry at himself for what he was privately thinking about. If he lost control, she could get hurt.
“No, only to ask for forgiveness,” Seanev said softly, walking through the room slowly. Alchan turned away from the table as Seanev walked around it and knelt, his head lowered. “I disagreed with Leria, but I allowed her to do it anyway. I should have fought harder in the name of my king to protect his interests and well-being. I knew you as a boy and as a man. I knew you would never condone the way Lady Lilliana was treated, even if it was a silent treatment. She was not ordered to take your bed, Leria only implied it, knowing better.”
“Do you think it would have been better your way?” Alchan asked, crossing his arms.
“I do,” Seanev said honestly, looking up. “I think a small introduction through letters would have been vastly more appropriate for both you and Lilliana, who would have needed time to adjust to possibly being courted and the concept of living away from the temple where she was raised.”
“Why?” Alchan growled. “She might be the only female I can tolerate in a bedroom, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t have—”