He had so plainly expected embarrassment and contrition that she almost laughed.
'I did realize that I was kissing him,' she said.
He stared at her, and her courage seeped away, because she knew what he was going to say next.
'And if Lexie had walked in?'
Samantha had no answer to that. The thought of Lexie knowing what had happened made her want to run away and not come back - and what if the boy told her? They had been at school together. She had forgotten what Pagford was like ...
'What the hell's going on with you?' asked Miles.
'I'm ... unhappy,' said Samantha.
'Why?' asked Miles, but then he added quickly, 'Is it the shop? Is it that?'
'A bit,' said Samantha. 'But I hate living in Pagford. I hate living on top of your parents. And sometimes,' she said slowly, 'I hate waking up next to you.'
She thought he might get angry, but instead he asked, quite calmly, 'Are you saying you don't love me any more?'
'I don't know,' said Samantha.
'Maybe he'll be the first of many!' yelled Samantha, getting up from the table and slamming her mug down in the sink; the handle came off in her hand. 'Don't you get it, Miles? I've had enough! I hate our fucking life and I hate your fucking parents - '
' - you don't mind them paying for the girls' education - '
' - I hate you turning into your father in front of me - '
' - absolute bollocks, you just don't like me being happy when you're not - '
' - whereas my darling husband doesn't give a shit how I feel - '
' - plenty for you to do round here, but you'd rather sit at home and sulk - '
' - I don't intend to sit at home any more, Miles - '
' - not going to apologize for getting involved with the community - '
' - well, I meant what I said - you're not fit to fill his shoes!'
'What?' he said, and his chair fell over as he jumped to his feet, while Samantha strode to the kitchen door.
'You heard me,' she shouted. 'Like my letter said, Miles, you're not fit to fill Barry Fairbrother's shoes. He was sincere.'
'Your letter?' he said.
'Yep,' she said breathlessly, with her hand on the doorknob. 'I sent that letter. Too much to drink one evening, while you were on the phone to your mother. And,' she pulled the door open, 'I didn't vote for you either.'
The look on his face unnerved her. Out in the hall, she slipped on clogs, the first pair of shoes she could find, and was through the front door before he could catch up.
Part Five Chapter IX
IX
The journey took Krystal back to her childhood. She had made this trip daily to St Thomas's, all on her own, on the bus. She knew when the abbey would come into sight, and she pointed it out to Robbie.
'See the big ruin' castle?'
Robbie was hungry, but slightly distracted by the excitement of being on a bus. Krystal held his hand tightly. She had promised him food when they got off at the other end, but she did not know where she would get it. Perhaps she could borrow money from Fats for a bag of crisps, not to mention the return bus fare.
'I wen' ter school 'ere,' she told Robbie, while he wiped his fingers on the dirty windows, making abstract patterns. 'An' you'll go to school 'ere too.'
When they rehoused her, because of her pregnancy, they were almost certain to give her another Fields house; nobody wanted to buy them, they were so run down. But Krystal saw this as a good thing, because in spite of their dilapidation it would put Robbie and the baby in the catchment area for St Thomas's. Anyway, Fats' parents would almost certainly give her enough money for a washing machine once she had their grandchild. They might even get a television.
The bus rolled down a slope towards Pagford, and Krystal caught a glimpse of the glittering river, briefly visible before the road sank too low. She had been disappointed, when she joined the rowing team, that they did not train on the Orr, but on the dirty old canal in Yarvil.
''Ere we are,' Krystal told Robbie, as the bus turned slowly into the flower-decked square.
Fats had forgotten that waiting in front of the Black Canon meant standing opposite Mollison and Lowe's and the Copper