Judy must see the panic on my face, because she comes to my rescue. “No need to worry. This isn’t a forced nudist community. You get to choose to be free of the weight of society’s appearance restrictions weighing on your shoulders.”
“Or—” Rob cuts in. “You can choose to wear clothing. Either way is just fine. We’re a zero pressure community.”
I blow out a relieved breath. Artist dude looks positively crestfallen. “Don’t worry. If I decide to go nude, you’ll be the first to know,” I promise him.
He sniffs in disappointment and takes the wrench out from behind his ear. “Thank you.”
He doesn’t even seem to want me to get naked just for naked’s sake. He just really wants this jacket. I’m not sure if I should be offended or not.
I look back at Judy and her men. Rob is wearing worn jeans and a button up, while Hale is wearing board shorts, a swimming shirt, and flip flops.
“Do you guys go nude?” I ask curiously.
“These two do,” Rob says, hiking a thumb over at them.
Hale claps him on the back. “Yeah, Robbie’s too self-conscious about the size of his dick.”
I snort out a laugh as Rob glares at his...brother-husband? Judy-lover-in-arms? Relationship compeer? I actually don’t know what to call them.
“My dick is bigger than yours, asswipe,” Rob shoots back.
Hummingbird Judy rolls her eyes. “Both of you have wonderfully fulfilling phalluses. Now come on.”
I swallow my laugh as the guys continue to razz each other back and forth as we double back to the music space. As soon as we approach the circle, the group stops what they’re doing and starts singing some sort of welcome chant, except none of them are singing the same lyrics, so it just sounds like a mishmash of voices that serenade at various pitches until they slowly taper off at different times.
I clear my throat and look around at all the expectant faces. “That was really…nice?” I say, accidentally making it sound like a question instead of a statement.
They don’t seem to notice, because the entire group grins happily at me.
“May the light shine out of you,” the guitar dude says.
Hummingbird Judy presses her palms together. “May the light reside within.”
Waving, we continue on, but my bare feet are sore, and all I wanna do is curl up in Warren’s suit jacket and take a nap.
“I can show you the pool and the relaxation room next,” Hummingbird Judy offers. “Or if you want, we can go take a hit on the pipe over there before seeing the dining tent.”
Gotta hand it to Judy for knowing how to have a good time.
“Actually, I’d really just love to rest for a bit? I’ve had kind of a long day.”
“Of course. There will be plenty of time to see more later. Let’s check the share board and see who you’ll be rooming with.”
She marches us over to the rec center, where I can see retirees holding their cue sticks and shoving their pucks at one another. And that’s not slang for something dirty.
“Shuffleboard!” I say excitedly. “Looks fun.”
Hale nods. “I’m the reigning champion,” he tells me seriously.
“That’s impressive.”
Rob rolls his eyes. “He won twice last Saturday, and one of them was because the other man had to forfeit when he threw his hip out.”
“It was still a legitimate win,” Hale defends.
“Sure it was.”
“Hush,” Hummingbird Judy reprimands them as she skims her finger down a sheet of paper. “Oh, you’re lucky. You’ll be staying with the twins.”
I just nod.
“I’ll walk you,” she offers, before looking at her lovers. “You two bozos can go home and get the kettle started. I need some ginger tea. I’m having digestion issues.”
They don’t even skip a beat. They just wave to me and then walk off, still making fun of each other about their shuffleboard strategies.
Hummingbird Judy leads me to the path that takes us to the individual huts. Some are bigger than others, but all of them have some sort of artistic expression to them, whether it be glass bottles stuck into the concrete or spray paint decorating the walls.
She breaks off the path and leads me to a hut that’s noticeably nicer than some of the others. It’s made of dark stained wood and has a metal roof sheeting that’s been cut to look like palm leaves. Hummingbird Judy wastes no time rapping on the door.
A woman answers in just a few seconds, and I look at the dark-skinned beauty, noting her long dreadlocks and reddish brown eyes. She has