storeroom, hardly breathing. A ray of dusty light falls through the small, high window, but it doesn’t find him in his corner. If he looks, he sees each single dust mote drifting in it like an atom in the void—his senses are keyed up to that pitch. His nerves vibrate like harp strings. He clutches his body, shaken by seismic shudders, his thin shoulders working up and down. His spine is taut, bent like an archer’s bow, ready to break. He wrings his hands. Did he groan? Did he make a sound? He clenches his jaw until his teeth hurt. He has been in an agony of fear since that day, knowing they would come for him. And now they have, that man who was here before, who saw him—the governor. He knows.
“My condolences, lady,” the governor is saying. “There’s no doubt it’s him, I have his signet ring here. I shouldn’t want to view the corpse if I were you, it’s, well, not a pleasant sight. We discovered him in the woods, miles from the city, near the spot where a couple of villagers found his horse. No, I do not intend to crucify them! It seems he fell from his horse and broke his neck. A tragic accident.”
An accident. Aulus lets his breath out slowly. Is it possible?
The governor is sitting in their atrium, his face composed in a somber expression, the corners of his mouth pulled down, but the eyes alert, moving here and there, fixing again on his mother, who stands before him immovable as a statue. Aulus, in the little side-chamber, can almost reach out and touch them.
And now the governor is puzzled, he shakes his head and pulls at his chin. “What was your husband doing out there?” he asks. “You don’t know? Come now, that’s not good enough. You must have some idea, he must have said something, some word. A man doesn’t ride out in the middle of nowhere for no reason. And he wasn’t alone. There was another horse, a chestnut. I’ve brought the horses along, if you’d care to look. None of yours are missing? You’re quite sure? It would be pointless, I suppose, to question your stableman again.” The governor sighs in exasperation.
Oh, mother, thank the gods for your strength!
And now the governor is saying, “You may have heard something about the disappearance of Silvanus, your husband’s chief accountant. We’re keeping it quiet but these things have a way of getting out. He was stealing from the treasury and he’s gotten away clean. Did Balbus ever mention a problem with him? Had his suspicions, you say? Talked about sacking him? Indeed he was a sullen, ill-favored character. And a sneak and a liar to boot? Well, very interesting.” The governor stands up now. “Back to the sad matter at hand. A private funeral would be best, don’t you think? No need to make too large an occasion of it. Eulogies, of course, from his colleagues and any close friends. I’ll handle the arrangements. Of course, I’ve notified the emperor. Well, then, I’ll just have them bring the casket in.”
And now four men are carrying in the box. It drops to the floor, making a noise in Aulus’ over-stretched ears as loud as a thunderclap, as reverberant as an earthquake. Breathe, breathe! he tells himself. But he sees the horror inside as though his eyes could pierce those wooden planks. The box sits like a huge, brutal, accusing fact. If it had a tongue what would it say? And now a kaleidoscope of images whirls through Aulus’ brain—jagged sparks and fiery red circles. There is a roaring in his ears, his throat constricts, saliva runs down his chin, his bowels unloose. He wants to run away but there is no place to run. His muscles jerk and contract until he thinks his bones will break. Don’t fall, don’t fall! But he feels himself rolling over on his side, limp as a bag of stones, his head poking through the curtain. And the last thing he sees is the governor’s shocked face hovering over him.
***
The Sun-Runner to the Father, greetings:
This is a catastrophe. The Lion is dead. The Romans have found the body and, though they claim it was an accident, I fear the worst. We may all be in danger. With your consent, Father, we must suspend our gatherings until such time as we know more. The risk is too great. Nama Mithras.