“S-She okay?” He stumbles, looking at her as if seeing her for the first time. For the first time in a year, I see worry behind that loathing. Actual tangible care. It’s slim and muddied by booze, but maybe that’s when he’s most honest.
“Would you be?”
His eyes fly to mine, challenging but riddled with loathing, and he shakes his head. “No. She d-deserves better.”
“You’re goddamn right, she does. You fucking twat.”
With a pinched expression, he comes closer, but I halt him with my palm. “Take a fucking shower. You smell like a washed-up drunkard who fondled one too many whores.”
He scoffs at me as if me telling him what to do is blasphemous. Maybe it is, but he’s not getting a single step closer. I’ll knock him out easily. I refuse to let him taint her even more. She’s already broken. So goddamn broken.
Right now, she’s his rag doll that got taken from orphanage to orphanage. Hit way too many times, spit on, kicked, and buried in the dirt. Lifeless, but hanging on to hope.
What hope is there?
Toby doesn’t look like he’s ready to change, but seeing the way his eyes are glazed over with emotion makes me wonder if he’s not a lost cause after all. Maybe he only needs a push in the right direction.
“Shower. Now. Or I won’t let you see her.”
He nods, staggering into their bedroom. Good. Because beating him was in the cards if he didn’t listen. He may be my best friend—even if he’s an absolute dickwad—but unlike him, I don’t give up on people. Right now, though, Joey concerns me most. She uses pain to drive her to live. She cuts to satiate the numbness. She bleeds to cleanse herself of loss. Toby does this to himself, and Joey doesn’t know how to stop. She’s young, unused to the brokenness of the man in the other room.
Now if I can somehow mend these two or sever them completely for their better interests... Now that’s the biggest and truest challenge, isn’t it?
I need to fix them.
Somehow.
Any way physically possible, it’ll happen.
Especially since they don’t seem to know how to do it themselves. But I won’t be Toby. I’ll keep my love platonic, even if I could love Joey better. There’s no corruption in my future, and I refuse to wreck another marriage. I already did that once. Even if I had to walk away to make sure I didn’t ruin myself, too.
I wonder if she still thinks of me. I do, especially when I’m on the isle where we met.
Some romances aren’t meant to be written about.
“I’m going to fix this, ma coccinelle. I promise,” I murmur against Joey’s forehead. Leaving a kiss as she’s finally lost the pained expression. Maybe she’s dreaming of a happier life. A safer one. I’ll do anything to prevent these two from killing themselves, if it’s the last thing I’ll ever accomplish. They matter too much to me to not intercede.
When Toby sobers up, he’s going to either fight me or he’s going to listen. No matter how much I repeat the notion in my head of him being settled, it’s more than likely he’s going to choose the former. Good thing I’m not the dainty kid I was in high school, so he’ll have a good partner to spar with.
And maybe when this is all said and done, the isle will call me home, and I’ll finally find peace.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Present
Gray
A little birdie mentioned you were in town. The first text comes through, making my heart run rampant.
I’m coming for you, Storm.
My hands are clammy as they grip the bottle of kombucha I’ve forced myself to drink. Its little chia seeds having me internally gagging. Eating has never been easy for me because I’m picky and textures set me in a spiral of heaves.
Something about the texts have me trembling. Deep and strong feelings of abandonment rise inside my chest. They beat and puncture the walls of my flesh, pressing forward, begging for access, and unless I battle them, he’ll win. That’s what he does, isn’t it? Win.
You can ignore me all you want, Gray. I will come for you, then after I’ve broken you, you’ll come for me too.
I shiver, swallowing back another gulp. The glass feels heavy in my palm while my phone feels like a brick in comparison. Dad said he’d be right back. That was hours ago.
It’s Joey.
Something’s wrong.
We haven’t been hanging out as much as we should. Doesn’t help that Ace