off my ring. The one on my finger belonged to Toby’s Mom’s. Only then when I’m leaving my finger naked, after it being so heavy for years, do I let the emotions slip from my eyes. The wetness smacks my chest, letting me know it isn’t going to be easy to end this.
“Goodbye,” I whisper to no one, shutting the door behind me. With a renewed sense of purpose, I head to the elevator, making sure not to enter the one the woman was in earlier.
As it trails down, my only prayer is that he doesn’t come up. It’d ruin this easy break for me. It wouldn’t take much for him to convince me to stay. He has so much power over me and this treacherous heart of mine.
When I finally hit the ground floor, I hit up the valet.
“Mrs. Hayes, so nice seeing you.” I nearly laugh and crawl out of my skin at the same time. Wouldn’t it be convenient for someone to say it’s nice to see me when mascara streaks my cheeks? I didn’t bother to clean up before rushing out.
“My car, Adam,” I rush. “And please hurry.” He must see the urgency in my eyes because his widen in response, and before I know it, he’s running toward the parking garage. I have my own spot, but parking in Hollow Ridge is hell. Their stalls are miserable to reverse out of, so I always use the valet service here.
When he comes back with my Lexus series, I smile and nearly cry. Toby bought me this car for Christmas, saying my Avalon needed to go. It’s the most beautiful vehicle I’ve ever owned, and it’s fast as hell too.
He exits the car and smiles at me, but it doesn’t meet his eyes. I reach into my purse and pull out a hundred, making sure he makes eye contact.
Handing it to him, I hold his hand a moment. “Please, don’t say anything to my husband.”
Understanding licks his features, but I can tell he’s getting the wrong ideas. Toby doesn’t beat me, I just need to leave. He nods at me. “Your secret is safe with me, Mrs. Hayes. Safe trip.”
More tears surface as I cry, and when I get into my car, the time on the radio shows my hour is up. Fuck. Connecting my Bluetooth, I set up my Heartbreak playlist waiting for my heart to literally break. Will I feel it? Will it make a sound? Will I even care?
NF’s “Time” blares from the speakers, and the waterworks come pouring out. This man always knows how to brutalize my vital organs with his vocals and emotive performances. And as the lyrics belt out, I press on my gas pedal and leave. Hollow Ridge has never been my home.
Being raised here, then moving back with Toby, it was never set in my soul as a place to stay forever. It wasn’t until Toby told me how much he wanted me to settle here with him that I did.
It’s amazing that in the years we’ve been here, not once has our paths crossed with his brother and Lo. It’s like they all avoided areas that they knew each other frequented. They don’t call him or reach out. It’s almost as if he disappeared, and they don’t care.
Even now, only five minutes from my favorite beach, I feel myself leaving like a death toll. It wracks my body with solidarity, making a pact with my soul that we’re damaged and done.
Now, I can move forward.
That’s what we both wanted.
The difference between then and now is it won’t be together.
Maybe it was never meant to be.
Chapter Forty-Five
Present
Toby
“What is it, Sanje?” I ask, wondering why he’s calling me and not talking to Joey. She works all day today. She wanted the extra time away from her mom, not that I blame her. She’s being tortured by memories that are all lies.
It’s not surprising she’s diving in deep.
“Remember when you told me not to waste your time three years ago?” he mutters dumbly. Either this guy is stupid, wasting my time, or thinks I care about that far into the past.
“Look, I don’t have—”
“Joey quit,” he interrupts me, sending my brain to skyrocket. I’m at the office on the main floor. Why didn’t she come to me? What happened? I’ve been in meetings all day; we’re opening a new store in Las Vegas, and it’s taking all of my spare time. Is she okay?