The footsteps gotcloser, and I felt pressure against the inside of my wrist. I couldn't feel the coolness of the fingers. The fire blistered away every memory of cool.
"Still no change?"
"None."
The lightest pressure, breath against my scorched skin.
"There's no scent of the morphine left."
"I know."
"Bella? Can you hear me?"
I knew, beyond all doubt, that if I unlocked my teeth I would lose it - I would shriek and screech and writhe and
thrash. If I opened my eyes, if I so much as twitched a finger - any change at all would be the end of my control.
"Bella? Bella, love? Can you open your eyes? Can you squeeze my hand?"
Pressure on my fingers. It was harder not to answer this voice, but I stayed paralyzed. I knew that the pain in his voice now was nothing compared to what it could be. Right now he only feared that I was suffering.
"Maybe... Carlisle, maybe I was too late." His voice was muffled; it broke on the word late.
My resolve wavered for a second.
"Listen to her heart, Edward. It's stronger than even Emmett's was. I've never heard anything so vital. Shell be perfect."
Yes, I was right to keep quiet. Carlisle would reassure him. He didn't need to suffer with me.
"And her - her spine?"
"Her injuries weren't so much worse than Esme's. The venom will heal her as it did Esme."
"But she's so still. I must have done something wrong."
"Or something right, Edward. Son, you did everything I could have and more. I'm not sure I would have had the persistence, the faith it took to save her. Stop berating yourself. Bella is going to be fine."
A broken whisper. "She must be in agony."
"We don't know that. She had so much morphine in her system. We don't know the effect that will have on her experience."
Faint pressure inside the crease of my elbow. Another whisper. "Bella, I love you. Bella, I'm sorry."
I wanted so much to answer him, but I wouldn't make his pain worse. Not while I had the strength to hold myself still.
Through all this, the racking fire went right on burning me. But there was so much space in my head now. Room to ponder their conversation, room to remember what had happened, room to look ahead to the future, with still endless room left over to suffer in.
Also room to worry.
Where was my baby? Why wasn't she here? Why weren't they talking about her?
"No, I'm staying right here," Edward whispered, answering an unspoken thought. "They'll sort it out."
"An interesting situation," Carlisle responded. "And I'd thought I'd seen just about everything."
"I'll deal with it later. We'll deal with it." Something pressed softly to my blistering palm.
"I'm sure, between the five of us, we can keep it from turning into bloodshed."
Edward sighed. "I don't know which side to take. I'd love to flog them both. Well, later."
"I wonder what Bella will think - whose side she'll take," Carlisle mused.
One low, strained chuckle. "I'm sure she'll surprise me. She always does."
Carlisle's footsteps faded away again, and I was frustrated that there was no further explanation. Were they talking so mysteriously just to annoy me?
I went back to counting Edward's breaths to mark the time.
Ten thousand, nine hundred forty-three breaths later, a different set of footsteps whispered into the room. Lighter. More... rhythmic.
Strange that I could distinguish the minute differences between footsteps that I'd never been able to hear at all before today.
"How much longer?" Edward asked.
"It won't be long now," Alice told him. "See how clear she's becoming? I can see her so much better." She sighed.
"Still feeling a little bitter?"
"Yes, thanks so much for bringing it up," she grumbled. "You would be mortified, too, if you realized that you were handcuffed by your own nature. I see vampires best, because I am one; I see humans okay, because I was one. But I can't see these odd half-breeds at all because they're nothing I've experienced. Bah!"
"Focus, Alice."
"Right. Bella's almost too easy to see now."
There was a long moment of silence, and then Edward sighed. It was a new sound, happier.
"She's really going to be fine," he breathed.
"Of course she is."
"You weren't so sanguine two days ago."
"I couldn't see right two days ago. But now that she's free of all the blind spots, it's a piece of cake."
"Could you concentrate for me? On the clock - give me an estimate."
Alice sighed. "So impatient. Fine. Give me a sec - "