Boy in the Club a boy & billionaire novel - Rachel Kane Page 0,86
it entirely ruined.
He kisses me, and I know he’s tasting not only my lips and tongue, but his cum.
There is a tenderness in this kiss that I do not expect. I thought… I thought it would be violent. A prelude to the next step. Maybe he would bend me over, fuck me, bareback me on this glass.
Maybe he will, in a moment.
But first he is holding me, kissing me, his eyes open and looking deeply into mine, his dark irises revealing nothing.
“No one is ever going to humiliate you, ever again,” he says when our lips part.
“Colby, don’t say that.”
“I promise you. There will never be anyone else in your life who will try to bend and break you.”
I’m shaking my head because it’s all too much. “I don’t— God, Colby, if you could see the real me, if you could see me the way I see myself, you wouldn’t—”
“I always get what I want, Finn. Don’t you understand that? And if I want you, then I will have you. I will steal you from yourself, from your self-hatred, from whatever this guilt is that hangs over you like a dark cloud. Now that you’ve said you want me, you understand that, right? You understand that nothing is ever going to get in the way? Not even those dark thoughts in the back of your mind, the ones you won’t tell me about?”
What can I say? I’m wordless. I’m not speechless, because I know I’m saying something, murmuring some nonsense with my face pressed against his throat, breathing in his aftershave and the clean scent of his skin, but they aren’t words, you couldn’t separate them out individually.
It’s just, I want you, I want you, I want you, over and over, echoing in my heart.
24
Colby
As days pass, what I realize about myself is how lonely I have been all this time. It’s something I didn’t really notice until now. Like not realizing how hungry you were, until you sit down at a meal.
This is what Finn does, the gift he gives me.
One of many gifts.
It is hard as hell to work now. For days, we’ve canceled calls and shuffled meetings, finding extra time to be together, alone, the office door locked—okay, yes, it’s hot as hell knowing someone could walk in, but at a certain point you want a guarantee of privacy.
We’ve fucked on both couches in my office, in my desk chair, on the desk itself, in the shower, in the closet for some reason (Finn perched up on the table where I keep cufflinks and ties, all my accessories thrown on the floor so I could eat his ass). We have even been to my apartment, which feels like a stranger’s home, like I don’t recognize any of the furniture.
He leaves me exhausted…
…and happy.
This is what my life has been missing.
An actual emotion. Something other than greed and rage, something other than this blank empty bossiness which is all I’ve had in me for months now.
Honeymoons, even boyfriend honeymoons, have to end sometime, and even though I don’t want the real world to intrude, I know I have to confront Jimi. I have to leave the comfort of Finn’s arms, for the grisly, gritty reality of Jimi’s ugly world.
“You don’t have to go,” Finn says to me this morning. He reaches for me from the bed. A bed! What a novel idea! Who ever thought that someone could sleep in his own bed in his own apartment, rather than on the couch in his office, and yet, that’s exactly what I did. My pillows are so much more comfortable than the arm of the couch. Why did I spend so much time at work? I can hardly understand it.
“I have to,” I tell him. “You know that. He’s going to keep calling, maybe he sends his goons for another visit to your house…we can’t have him scaring your roommates.”
He slides out of bed, naked, his morning wood jutting from him. I don’t want to go. I want to suck on his cock, want him to come in my mouth, to luxuriate in the taste of his seed. With a sad sort of fondness, I reach for his shaft and give it a playful tug.
He grins. “You’ll stay?”
I shake my head, and bend to kiss the head of his cock, to put my tongue against his slit, to taste the salt of last night’s sex still on his skin. “You know I have to talk to him.”