I grab the lamp so hard and fast, the electric cord rips off the wall. I bang Samuel on the head repeatedly, over and over again, with a force I didn’t even know I possessed. He’s turned me into a crazy woman. It’s the fight or flight instinct. I bash his face in, and blood splatters all over my floor. It doesn’t scare me, it relieves me. I’m winning. I’m surviving.
When I’m sure I’ve finally beaten him into submission, I attempt to stand, but my legs are too shaky. I crawl to the door instead. My hands are trembling as I try to turn the door knob. When I finally open the door, Ethan is standing on the other side, and his eyes widen in fear when he sees me. I wrap my arms around him. “It’s okay, Ethan. Mommy is okay.”
The feel of his touch calms me, and my nerves settle just a little. I’m able to stand. I pick him up, and run straight out of there. I run straight to Abigail’s — she’s the closest.
I’m still shaking when she answers the door. Her jaw drops when she sees us. “What the hell is going on?”
I push my way inside. “Lock the door.”
“What’s going on, Gretchen?”
“I need to call 911.”
“What the heck is going on?”
“You know Samuel?” I ask. “Well, I-I found him…” My voice cracks. “I… found him in my bedroom.”
She studies me with wide eyes. “No way.”
“He had rope. He was trying to tie me up.”
She reaches for her phone, presses 9-1-1, and hands it to me.
My voice is shaky, uneven, as I attempt to communicate with the officer. Thankfully, her voice is very soothing and she manages to calm me, and I finally tell her what’s going on. Officers and paramedics are sent immediately. I insist that I’m fine, that I do not need a paramedic, but she says it’s protocol.
I try to soothe Ethan who’s as upset as I am. He’s confused and scared. I realize that he probably did not see Samuel at all. He most likely just heard the screaming and the commotion.
I carry him to Abby’s sofa and wrap my arms around him. “Everything is okay,” I tell him. “Mommy just had a really bad dream. Everything’s okay now.”
Abigail gives us chocolate milk in an attempt to calm us down. Shortly after, officers show up to take my statement. I’m told that the perpetrator has fled. “Well, he won’t be able to go too far,” I tell them. “I know where he lives.”
A paramedic checks me out. He attends to my bruised eye and tapes up a cut on my forehead. No stitches needed thankfully.
It’s hours later when everyone finally leaves. Ethan is sound asleep in Abigail’s guest room.
“Hey, where’s Abe?” I ask, just noticing his absence.
She smiles. “Work trip.”
“Oh,” I say. “Can we sleep over?”
She reaches out and hugs me tight. “Of course you can. I insist.”
I’m quite the sight when I show up at work the next day. Thankfully, Ethan is at daycare. I don’t know if I can leave him in that apartment. I’m still so scared.
“What in the heavens happened to you?” Rosetta asks as soon as I enter our office.
“You won’t believe it.”
She takes my hand and sits me down on my desk chair, like a teacher might do with a small child. “Tell me everything.”
I tell her all about Samuel and the ensuing nightmare. She listens intently with wide eyes and parted lips.
“We need to tell Boss Man about this.”
“I know. I don’t want to.”
She takes my hand and I follow her to Weston’s office. He’s hunched over a bunch of papers, busy working. He raises his gaze, and his face falls as soon as he sees me. He bounces from his chair and lunges in my direction. “Grasshopper… what happened to you?”
We all settle in the sitting area, Weston and I on the loveseat, and Rosetta in the armchair. I repeat the whole story for what seems like the thousandth time.
All the while, Weston cannot believe his ears. He’s appalled, horrified, and worried as hell. He takes me in his arms. “I’ll protect you. I promise.”
I glance over at Rosetta who studies us with a raised brow. Weston won’t let go. He’s not the most affectionate man, more of a hand shaker than a hugger. But right now, I’m held captive in his arms. And despite Rosetta’s curiosity, I kind of like it. I feel protected