The Bookish Life of Nina Hill - Abbi Waxman Page 0,29
It wasn’t exactly a never-ending cavalcade of light and motion, but it was change.
However, the high spot was definitely the Author’s Evening at Knight’s, on Saturday night. Author’s Evenings meant setting out a load of chairs, which meant moving bookcases and putting out plastic cups of warm white wine or plates of crackers and sweaty cheese, then standing there ready to sell multiple copies of the author’s books so he or she could sign them. It wasn’t hard, and sometimes the authors were fun, but occasionally Nina wasn’t in the mood, and this was one of those evenings.
It didn’t help that the staff weren’t supposed to drink the wine, but that night Nina was so cranky Liz actually urged her to break her own rule. “You’re being a pill, Nina,” she said. “Have a drink and chill out. This book is fun, the author is hopefully fun, and you’re not a child soldier in Rwanda, so get a grip.”
Liz was right, of course. She had a variety of these comparisons: Aside from the child soldier, Nina had also not been a twelfth-century Catholic martyr, a tribute from a forgettable district in The Hunger Games, Scout’s Halloween ham costume, and the first one voted off the island. You had to stay on your toes with Liz; she could throw any number of references at you, and you had to be ready for them.
Nina tried to pull herself together. She’d been irritable all week. Either her period was coming or she had a brain tumor, and at that moment the tumor felt more appealing, which probably meant it was her period. “OK, you’re right. What’s the book again?”
Liz sighed at her. “Unleash Your Inner Animal by Theodore Edwards.”
“Teddy Edwards? His inner animal is presumably a stuffed bear?”
Liz looked at her employee and narrowed her eyes. “One drink, Nina.”
Theodore Edwards turned out to be the least cuddly-looking Teddy that Nina had ever seen: tall and angular, with a tiny goatee and an actual pair of pince-nez on a long handle. Wait, that might make them lorgnettes—hold on, yes, lorgnettes are the ones with handles. Anyway, he had a pair of those, plus the aforementioned tiny beard, and the overall effect was one of a highly affected praying mantis who was going to peer at you closely before biting your head off and dabbing his chin with a handkerchief. You might not have felt this way about him, but Nina had a rich imagination to compensate for her lack of spending money.
As the crowd started to filter in, Nina noticed that they were mostly older women, and by older she meant fifties and up. She was as biased as the next person, unconsciously or not, and made the assumption that this was going to be a quiet evening. She looked around for Liz, saw her engrossed talking to a customer, and slipped a second cup of wine. Shuddering, because it really was piss poor and warm to boot, Nina dropped the cup in the trash and kept herself busy walking around with the rest of the tray. Everyone helped themselves, and the atmosphere warmed up. People seemed to know one another. There was a lot of hugging and eye widening.
Liz checked her watch, then stepped up to the front of the room, where Theodore Edwards was already perched on a stool, cleaning his antennae. Not really, just joking. His antennae were already clean. Nina found herself wanting to giggle and realized she should have stuck with one glass of wine.
Liz said, “It’s my pleasure to present Theodore Edwards, whose book Unleash Your Inner Animal hit the New York Times bestseller list this week.” Everyone applauded, and Nina took a closer look at the book. It seemed to be a nonfiction, self-help kind of thing. She put it down and paid attention, like she was supposed to.
Theodore cleared his throat. His voice was surprisingly deep and attractive, and made him seem less like a praying mantis and more like a bear or something, dressed as a praying mantis.
“Welcome, fellow animals,” he said. “What a pleasure to see so many of you here, ready to look inward and encourage your secret animal to come out and be free.”
Nina wondered idly if she should have put out a litter tray.
Teddy amped up his delivery. “Civilization has crushed so many of us and driven us away from our place in the natural world. It’s hard to even remember we are mammals, just part of life’s great chain of