be counted among Philippe’s children,” Matthew said. “The de Clermont name will protect her from all sorts of threats.”
“And for this tenuous toehold in the family, you would sell your soul to that devil?” Fernando was genuinely surprised.
“For Diana’s sake?” Matthew turned away. “I would do anything. Pay any price.”
“Your love for her borders on obsession.” Fernando stood his ground when Matthew whirled back around, his eyes black. “It is not healthy, Mateus. Not for you. Nor for her.”
“So Sarah’s been filling your ears with my shortcomings, has she? Diana’s aunts never really did approve of me.” Matthew glared at the house. It may have been a trick of the light, but the house appeared to be shaking on its foundations with laughter.
“Now that I see you with their niece, I understand why,” Fernando said mildly. “The blood rage has always made you prone to excessive behavior. Being mated has made it worse.”
“I have thirty years with her, Fernando. Forty or fifty, if I’m lucky. How many centuries did you share with Hugh?”
“Six,” Fernando bit out.
“And was that enough?” Matthew exploded. “Before you judge me for being consumed with my mate’s well-being, put yourself in my shoes and imagine how you would have behaved had you known that your time with Hugh would be so brief.”
“Loss is loss, Matthew, and a vampire’s soul is as fragile as that of any warmblood. Six hundred years or sixty or six—it doesn’t matter. When your mate dies, a part of your soul dies with him. Or her,”
Fernando said gently. “And you will have your children—Marcus as well as the twins—to comfort you.”
“How will any of that matter if Diana is not here to share it?” Matthew looked desperate.
“No wonder you were so hard on Marcus and Phoebe,” Fernando said with dawning understanding.
“Turning Diana into a vampire is your greatest desire—”
“Never,” Matthew interrupted, his voice savage.
“And your greatest horror,” Fernando finished.
“If she became a vampire, she would no longer be my Diana,” Matthew said. “She would be something—someone—else.”
“You might love her just the same,” Fernando said.
“How could I, when I love Diana for all that she is?” Matthew replied.
Fernando had no answer for this. He could not imagine Hugh as anything but a vampire. It had defined him, given him the unique combination of fierce courage and dreamy idealism that had made Fernando fall in love with him.
“Your children will change Diana. What will happen to your love when they are born?”
“Nothing,” Matthew said roughly, snatching at the maul. Fernando tossed the heavy tool easily from one hand to the other to keep it out of his reach.
“That is the blood rage talking. I can hear it in your voice.” The maul went sailing through the air at ninety miles an hour and landed in the O’Neils’ yard. Fernando grabbed Matthew by the throat. “I am frightened for your children. It pains me to say it—to even think it—but I have seen you kill someone you loved.”
“Diana. Is. Not. Eleanor.” Matthew ground out the words one at a time.
“No. What you felt for Eleanor is nothing compared to what you feel for Diana. Yet all it took was a casual touch from Baldwin, a mere suggestion that Eleanor might agree with him rather than you, and you were ready to tear them both apart.” Fernando searched Matthew’s face. “What will you do if Diana sees to the babies’ needs before yours?”
“I’m in control now, Fernando.”
“Blood rage heightens all the instincts a vampire has until they are as keen as honed steel. Your possessiveness is already dangerous. How can you be sure you will keep it in check?”
“Christ, Fernando. I can’t be sure. Is that what you want me to say?” Matthew drove his fingers through his hair.
“I want you to listen to Marcus instead of building fences and seeing to the gutters,” Fernando replied. “Not you, too. It’s madness to even think of branching out on my own with Benjamin on the loose and the Congregation up in arms,” Matthew snapped.
“I was not talking about forming a scion.” Fernando thought Marcus’s idea was excellent, but he knew when to keep his own counsel.
“What, then?” Matthew said with a frown.
“Your work. If you were to focus on the blood rage, you might be able to stop whatever plans Benjamin is setting into motion without striking a single blow.” Fernando let this sink in before he continued. “Even Gallowglass thinks you should be in a laboratory analyzing that page you have from the Book of Life,