hard as ice. She drops the pouch with my grace bones and races away, despite her injured ankle. She darts past Bastien and rushes toward the last swirling particles of Tyrus’s Gate.
My breath catches. “Mother, no!” I spring up and bolt after her, my blood on fire.
The Gate is closing, but the siren song swells. I stiffen every muscle and cast up a wall against the lure of the Underworld. My heart twinges when I jump over Bastien’s prostrate body, but I barrel onward, my speed blazing faster than ever. My mother is quickly within reach.
My arm stretches out for her. “Please, don’t do this!” I shouldn’t care if she leaves me—if she sacrifices herself for someone she loves stronger. But I do. Elara help me, I do.
I can’t grab her in time. She pushes off the ground in a tremendous leap. Her hair is a river of darkness as she flies. Through the air. Through the dust. Through the Gate.
Dust blasts apart like she’s broken through glass. It doesn’t re-form into an arched door. It falls into the abyss in a rush of glittering black.
I crumple to my knees. “Mother!”
53
Sabine
I STARE AT THE WALL where the black dust swirled a moment ago. The shimmer of Elara’s Gate has also vanished. My knife trembles against Casimir’s neck. I can’t release him, not even to wipe my tears. Mother. How can I feel such terrible heaviness? All my life, Odiva held a strong attachment to me. I never understood why—not until three days ago. There wasn’t enough time to grow to hate her . . . or find a deeper place in my heart for her. And now she’s gone, her last sacrifice in vain.
Ailesse slowly turns from the wall. One of her hands grips a fistful of hair at her scalp; the other hangs lifelessly at her side. Our eyes meet. I see her chin wobble. I ache to run across the bridge and let her cry on my shoulder.
“Let me go to her,” Cas pleads, despite all the inexplicable things he’s seen tonight. “Let me comfort her.”
Before I can threaten him to keep quiet, Ailesse sighs and her eyes flutter closed. “Oh, Sabine . . . why did you bring him here?” No anger rakes across her quiet voice, just overwhelming fatigue. “Please, just take him away.”
I frown. She wants me to leave? “But—”
She looks at Bastien and crumples to the ground, sobbing with fresh pain. “My mother killed him when she found out he wasn’t my . . .” She buries her head in her hands, refusing to say “amouré.”
Does she think Bastien’s death is my fault? My chest burns with a sting of betrayal. “You have no idea how hard I’ve fought to . . .” I clamp my mouth shut and take a moment to rein in my frustration. “All I wanted to do was save you, Ailesse. I’ve been trying to save you since the night you were captured. I didn’t know you’d had a change of heart.”
She lifts her gaze to me. Her eyes are red. “Of course you didn’t. I’m sorry. This isn’t your fault, Sabine.” But it is, even though I never meant to hurt her. “I know you were trying to save me. Somehow I . . . I saw you.” Her brow wrinkles. “It was like a dream. You gave me hope when I needed it.” Her mouth trembles into a smile. It’s small and fleeting, but genuinely grateful. It eases the tightness in my chest.
Cas draws breath like he’s going to say something, but I press my blade closer against his neck.
I don’t know what to do about him anymore. If I let him go, Ailesse will still have to track him down later. “I realize this is a difficult time for you,” I say tentatively, “but we need to take care of Cas—Casimir,” I correct myself. I don’t want her thinking I’m on casual terms with him. “This is your ritual knife,” I add.
The pulse at Cas’s throat jumps, vibrating along the bone blade. He grapples with the hilt to yank it away, but he can’t outmatch my strength.
Ailesse isn’t listening anymore. She stares at my shoulder necklace—her necklace. The golden jackal pendant suddenly weighs heavy. “You completed your rite of passage?” she asks. Disappointment etches across her face. Is she jealous? She’s never been jealous of me. “You really killed your amouré?”
“No!” The thought is revolting, although I came close to killing hers. Now I wish I