“No,” I say quickly. I glance at a tall weed growing through a crack in the sidewalk. “Let’s meet somewhere for dinner. I’ll text you.”
“I can’t wait to see you!” she squeals before hanging up.
I return to the room to find Ginny swaying with Ellie in her arms.
“How did that go?” she asks.
“We’re going to meet for dinner,” I say, scrolling through my phone. “I have to think of somewhere low-key that is baby-friendly.” And not packed for the holidays.
“Why don’t I just stay with Ellie?”
“Oh, I don’t know if…” I haven’t been away from her since she was born.
“It’s going to be crazy everywhere this close to Christmas,” Ginny points out meaningfully.
Not only will it be hard to get in most family-friendly places but it’s a lot more likely I’ll be seen with a baby this time of year. I might be ready to come clean to Poppy, but I don’t want to star as the gossip at every Christmas party in Valmont, especially my family’s. Still, it’s not that simple. “She doesn’t take a bottle very well, and I can’t exactly pump.”
“How often does she eat?” Ginny asks.
“Every two hours, or whenever she starts screaming,” I admit sheepishly.
“Then feed her, head out, and be back here in two hours,” she says with a shrug. “You can take my car.”
I shake my head. “There’s no way I’m stranding you here. I’ll call an Uber.”
“Even better.”
Without the baby, there are more options and I text Poppy to meet me at a nearby Hennie’s before I show Ginny everything I think she might need to know. “If she’s wet, there will be a blue line on the diaper,” I say, holding up a clean one. “Now the tabs go in the back and—”
“I know how to change a diaper, Adair,” she cuts me off with an amused snort.
“Oh. Of course.” I don’t add that I didn’t know until a nurse showed me how. Despite the fact that she obviously has a step up on me where babies are concerned, she listens patiently to the rest of my advice, which includes everything from Ellie’s favorite ways to be comforted to when to dial 911. When I finish, she’s staring at me with a puzzled expression. “What? Ok, I know. I’m going over-the-top.”
“It’s not that.” She shakes her head. “I didn’t expect you to be so...prepared. No offense.”
“It’s been trial by fire,” I confess, kissing Ellie’s forehead, “but she’s worth it.”
“I can see that,” Ginny says softly. “Adair, I—” An incoming alert buzzes on my phone, and she stops. “I think your ride’s here. You better hurry. See you soon.”
Maybe it’s the fact that I’ve never left Ellie to go out before or maybe it’s where I’m leaving her, but it feels like my feet are encased in concrete, each step away harder to take than the last. Ginny waves me off when I reach the Uber sitting in the parking spot next to her car. After the door closes, I pause and listen for the slide of the lock. Getting into the car and closing the door turns out to be nearly as hard as walking away. The driver stares at me like I’ve grown a second head.
“You’re going to Hennie’s?” he says impatiently as I buckle up.
“Yeah. The one off 155,” I add quickly, afraid he’ll take me to a different location farther away.
He bobs his head and takes off while I swivel in my seat and watch the motel, my heart aching, until it becomes a spec on the road behind me. When I can’t see it anymore, the aching becomes so intense that I nearly tell him to turn around. It takes every ounce of restraint I possess to stop myself, but I can't help feeling like I left my heart behind in room 113 of the Half-point Motel.
By the time I spot the familiar Hennie’s sign, glowing in purple and red neon, I think I might vomit. Poppy’s car is in the parking lot, which only makes me feel worse. Dragging myself out of the car, I thank my driver who doesn’t bother to reply and prepare to face Poppy.
“You’re wasting time,” I say as I stare at the swinging door, half hoping it will open and Poppy will spill out and carry me inside. But she’s already in there, waiting, and I can’t avoid this any longer.
As soon as I’m inside, I glance around the familiar interior. It’s a bit different than the Hennie’s I grew up