Blood of Zeus (Blood of Zeus #1) - Meredith Wild Page 0,72

away from that promise. Every one of us will suffer. Not just you.”

I slam my eyes closed, determined not to cry or beg for another answer. As much as I want one, I’m terrified of what it would be. Of the gruesome details she’d be ready to supply, outlining exactly what she means by her last two sentences.

“Kara, darling,” she continues, with the sugary reassurance of a mother consoling a child. “Follow your head here, not your heart. The demon blood running through your veins is your greatest gift. Your most valuable asset. And you get to pass it on to ensure that your children are even stronger. And once you do, you’ll understand how important you are to all of this. Too important to give in to these other cravings. That means you must put any mortal into the back files for now. After you’ve served the cause, you’re a free woman. You can have whatever affairs you want, where and whenever you want.”

“I don’t want to have affairs.”

I don’t scream it, but I yearn to. Even the thought of one affair, let alone many, turns my stomach. I want to be with someone. Fall in love with that person. Follow my dreams. I’ve never known it with such certainty until now.

Mother sighs quietly. “The best way to manage this is to eliminate the temptation, I suppose. I’ll talk to the university and have Kane removed for this behavior. There has to be some policy he’s violated. He had his hands all over you.”

Panic makes me jerk my stare up. “No!”

She lifts an eyebrow in challenge. “What else would you have me do? This doesn’t look good. And it’s only going to get worse if you two are involved in any way, academically or otherwise. Mark my words. This ends today.”

I’m drowning in dread now. I can’t hide the pleading in my eyes. Except my mother’s returning gaze is far from a life raft. It’s more like she’s tying a boulder to my ankle, determined to sink my dreams once and for all. And along with it, my spirit.

I swallow hard, already devastated by what I’m about to say. Of all the consequences I envisioned, I never expected this one. But she’s leaving me no other choice. And no one will be happier than her to hear it. I’m not fooled for a second by her surface-level sorrow.

“I know this is difficult for you, Kara, but—”

“I’ll quit.”

Thick silence fills the room. As if the energy between these walls wasn’t unbearable enough, I pick up on the hint of her reaction before I witness it in the sudden relaxing of her shoulders. Relief. Overwhelming relief.

Exactly what I expected.

So why am I still so devastated?

I close my eyes briefly, refusing to let the burning tears behind them escape. “I’ll drop out.”

“Are you certain that’s what you want?”

She’s only asking because she already knows the answer. And because she wants me to be clear about mine, no matter how badly my throat already burns with heartbreak.

“Of course it’s not what I want, but I won’t destroy Maximus’s career over this. It’s my fault, not his.”

But given the chance to do it all again, I wouldn’t change a single action or word. Not even as my mother folds her hands neatly in front of her like she’s just negotiated a deal with favorable terms.

Checkmate. She wins.

She always wins.

“If that’s your choice—and it is a choice—then I will accept that.”

I linger in the kitchen for a while, make myself some tea, and contemplate sneaking out to the guesthouse. But I don’t know what I would say once I got there. Gramps doesn’t need the weight of this on him. For his own reasons—not even including how he’d be part of my punishment—he’d probably agree with my mother’s position on this matter anyway.

Damn it.

I’m in psychological quarantine here.

The recognition has me shaking my head in utter disbelief, the same way I have at least a hundred times before when contemplating my future. Why haven’t my visions for it ever held a glimpse of this path that’s been charted for me? Why haven’t I latched on to some of it as inevitable and real?

Even when I’ve accepted it in my mind, it never reached my heart. I don’t think it ever will. Not with children. Not with fame and more money. Certainly not with the slow death of my dreams. And not without Maximus…

“There you are.”

I turn at the sound of Arden’s voice, self-assured as ever.