Warren looked astonished. He reached inside the wall again, a little deeper this time. A moment later, he retrieved a child’s teddy bear, ragged, with a tattered blue velvet bow.
“Max,” Warren said, adjusting the dusty bow. “I dropped him, the night she came for me.” His chin quivered. “She wouldn’t let me go back to get him.”
“Josephine?”
“Yes,” he said. “All I could think about was how cold he’d be in the snow. It was so cold.”
I put my hand on his shoulder. “Your mother found him and saved him for you,” I said. “She knew you’d come home.”
Warren rose to his feet, cradling the little bear in his arms. He pressed his face against the bear’s, tucking his finger under the frayed ribbon, the way he might have done as a boy. It was only fabric, thread, and stuffing, crudely sewn. But to Warren this stuffed creature might have been worth every dollar of his fortune.
“I’ll be out front,” I whispered, offering him the moment of solitude I felt he needed. “We can leave when you’re ready.”
He nodded, and I walked out to the front of the café. Dominic tucked his hands in his pockets and looked at me sheepishly. “I’m so sorry for—”
“Please don’t apologize,” I said. “Everything worked out the way it was supposed to.” I looked back at Warren. “When he’s ready, he has something he’d like to talk to you about.”
Dominic looked at me quizzically. “He does?”
I smiled and walked to the door without pausing to see the regret in his eyes.
“Good-bye, Dominic,” I said, pushing the door open and stepping out to the street. Ethan would be there soon. We were beginning a new chapter—a better one—and every part of me felt lighter because of it. The sun filtered through the trees, and I noticed a barrel-chested robin pecking around near my feet. Bold and unscathed by my presence, she stared up at me with her head cocked to the right. It took a moment before I noticed her nest a few feet away, lying in a mangled pile of loose twigs and swaths of moss on the sidewalk. A single blue egg with a jagged crack along the center lay on the cement, its yolky center spilling out onto the curb.
Poor thing. She lost her baby, just as Vera had lost hers—I took a deep breath—and just as I had lost mine. It was unfair. It was tragic. But it was life.
The bird circled the nest, pecking in vain at a twig, before retreating a few feet away on the curb. I could almost feel the moment when she realized her efforts were futile. The moment she let go. She flew into the air, stopping briefly on a branch of the cherry tree overhead as if to memorize the scene, to say a final good-bye.
I felt the tug in my belly just then, the old ache. I wrapped my arms around the abdomen that had carried and lost a baby. Good-bye, my Daniel. “I will always love you,” I whispered.
The wind picked up just then, rustling the branches of the cottonwood tree overhead, disturbing its fluffy seedlings and sending them flying through the air. Just like snow. I caught one in my hand and smiled, looking up to the sky as the robin flapped her wings, circled overhead, and then flew away.
Acknowledgments
A heartfelt thank you to my dear literary agent, Elisabeth Weed, for her encouragement, guidance, and kindness, always. Elisabeth, working with you is such a pleasure and a privilege. Also, much gratitude and a double-shot latte to Stephanie Sun, whose feedback always make my stories stronger. (Wait, make that a triple!) And, a huge thanks to Jenny Meyer for sharing my books with readers in so many countries—from Germany to Italy, Spain to Turkey, and more (wow!)—and Dana Borowitz at UTA, for representing my books so proficiently in the world of film.
To my friends at Plume, beginning with my extraordinary editor, Denise Roy, who was immediately enthusiastic about this story, from the title to its characters, reading the first draft late into the night so she could give me quick feedback—you are, in a word, amazing, and I adore working with you. To Phil Budnick, Kym Surridge, Milena Brown, Liz Keenan, Ashley Pattison, the incredible Plume sales force, and the many, many others at Penguin who work hard to make my novels successful, I am so grateful for your support and partnership.