Bittersweet (Redemption #3) - Jessica Prince Page 0,66
his wife he didn’t have time to be a pain in Farah’s ass anymore.
“That’s the problem. I don’t know what would make me happy. I’m working on forgiving him, hell, I think I already have, but I can’t forget how I felt when he left. I don’t think I’d survive it a second time.”
“But what if he doesn’t leave this time?” Poppy asked.
“Everyone leaves,” I said in a small voice.
“I haven’t. Farah hasn’t. Your aunt and uncle haven’t. All the people in this town who love you are still here, babe, and we aren’t going anywhere. You’re so wrapped up in trying to protect yourself that you haven’t opened your eyes to see we’re all here for you. You can play the what-if game all you want, but at the end of the day, you can’t turn your feelings off. If you still care about him, lying to yourself isn’t going to change that. The hurt will still be there, only you won’t have any of the good memories to soothe the sting because you never took a chance. All that does is make it hurt twice as much, honey.”
“It’s not like that between us,” I argued, the lie making my voice weak.
“All right,” Farah said, giving her head a resolute nod. “If you say it’s not like that then we believe you. But just so you know, we don’t think it wouldn’t be bad if it was.”
With my house spotless and my friends gone, I’d had time to sit back and dwell on everything they’d said. I thought so hard about it that even sexy Rip doing ranch work on my television couldn’t distract me.
By the time I heard Jensen’s truck pull into the driveway, I was almost feeling like myself again, and the war that had been waging between my head and my heart had come to a standstill. I knew which way I was leaning, but I couldn’t let myself fully go there, at least not yet. Not until I got answers to some very important questions.
Throwing back the covers, I climbed out of bed and padded down the hall to the living room just in time to see my boy come barreling through the front door. “Hey kiddo. You have a good day?”
“It was the best!” he shouted, running over and slamming into me, his little arms squeezing my hips in the tightest hug. Man, but my boy gave good hugs. “I got to hang out with Dad at his work. Laeth said he’d show me how to hack into computers when I get older, and Gage said he’d teach me how to do a chokehold when I turn six!”
I shot a panicked look at Jensen, only breathing a sigh of relief when he gave his head a tiny shake telling me he wouldn’t let his buddies teach my kid to be a felon. “Well, that’s . . . um . . . cool?”
“Super cool!”
“I’m glad you had fun, baby. Go drop your stuff in your room so we can eat, yeah?”
He was down the hallway before I finished my sentence, and when I turned to Jensen, I had a brow arched in question. “Computer hacking and chokeholds? Really?”
He moved deeper into the house. “Don’t worry. I won’t let any of that happen. But just in case it ever does, you should know they’d also teach him to cover his tracks so he’d never get caught.”
“Oh, well then it’s totally fine!”
He let out a laugh and held up the large paper bag he’d been carrying. “I got you manicotti from Mangiamo. And cannoli for dessert. That’s still your favorite, right?”
Oh man! The hits just kept on coming. Even if I’d spent the entire day steeling myself against my heart and body’s reaction to him, it wouldn’t have done a damn bit of good. My defenses were worthless against his thoughtful gestures.
“Uh, y-yeah. It’s still my favorite.” Although, I hadn’t eaten there in a really long time because I was broke as hell most days.
“Good. Then I’ll plate it while you get drinks.” He started by me on the way to the kitchen, but stopped to bend his neck and and press a kiss to my temple before whispering, “You look a lot better, honey. Glad you rested up.”
I stood frozen in place with my eyes squeezed shut for several seconds as the smell of his cologne filled my nostrils, making me lightheaded. It had been a barely-there touch of his lips, a small kiss that didn’t