Bitter Pills - CoraLee June

Prologue

Sunshine

Thinking of Nix was like sinking my teeth into a ripe lemon. Wondering where he was turned my mood sour. Missing him was like diving headfirst into insanity. I questioned everything. I doubted myself, doubted him, and doubted the bond I was once so sure of. It was karma in its purest form.

But I knew he was watching me. Maybe it was the way our souls were intertwined, a deep connection I could feel in my gut. Maybe it was just wishful thinking. Maybe I was drowning in hope and barely keeping my head above the surface. But Nix had his dark, inquisitive, perfect eyes on me. My best friend was out there. I knew it.

“Sunshine, you okay?” a rough voice asked at my back. I spun around to greet Gavriel, a tight feeling growing in my chest at the sight of him. He was wearing his usual: an expensive suit and hooded dark eyes. Gavriel stood tall. The red battle scars on his skin bloomed, reminding me of how godlike he was. Gavriel defied death. He challenged God. He was a mountain of a man, a strong king ruling over the people he loved.

My husband had been working a lot lately, expanding his business to more legal ventures as we settled down. He’d been investing a lot into Ryker’s new MMA club, too. The transition hadn’t been easy, though. Once a Bullet, always a Bullet. The only way out really was death. Gavriel had too many partners who didn’t want to lose their lucrative arrangement and even more enemies eager to take him down.

“Yeah, just thinking about Nix,” I replied to his question with a sigh. I was always thinking about Nix. He was an intrusive thought that called to me like a siren. Inevitable. Unbreakable. He was a constant presence in my mind. Five years wasn’t nearly long enough to dull the pain left in my heart from his disappearance. It was only fair. I had a debt to pay. I never fully understood the turmoil my guys felt when I left them all those years ago, but now I felt the ache with excruciating clarity.

I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy—not that I had any living enemies left to wish it on.

“Come here,” he whispered while sitting down at the wooden kitchen table. I admired the look of him sitting there for a moment, legs parted, his body leaned back like he didn’t have a care in the world. Gavriel’s muscles bulged in his shirt as he stroked his chin, beckoning me. Our new house was being renovated. It was a beautiful property outside of the city, with enough space for all of us. We’d been making our relationships work, traveling and going with the flow. It was fine for a little while, but after five long years of exploring and settling into our relationships, I realized that I wanted to set up roots. All of us. Together. We’ve been working toward that, enduring the growing pains of our happily ever after. Until the house was ready, the guys and I were in transition and staying at Gavriel’s penthouse.

Ryker worked at the gym. Callum started a local business as a private investigator. Blaise took fewer bounty jobs. Gavriel…well, Gavriel was struggling to cut the ties of his bloody business.

And even with the new house, something still felt off. I still felt like I had to look over my shoulder whenever I went anywhere. Our lives lacked routine and the sense of security I craved. I loved each of my men for who they were. I wanted us to fit our lives together, but this puzzle was complex and dangerous. I wasn’t sure a pretty house outside of the city could stabilize the dynamic we had. It felt wrong wanting more, but I did. Hell, I didn’t even know what more meant. I had them. Wasn’t that enough?

I sauntered over to Gavriel and straddled his lap, cupping his cheeks with my hands. “I hate the sad look in your eyes, Sunshine,” he rasped before leaning up to place a soft, tender kiss to my lips. I remembered a time that I thought the only physical relationship between us would be from a place of anger and resentment. I could still feel his heated eyes and furious fingers working my clit as he spewed cruelty like venom from his lips. It seemed so far away, now. Gavriel was gentle with me—unless I pushed his buttons, which happened often.

“I feel