Bitter Kisses (It's Just High School #3) - Thandiwe Mpofu Page 0,91
over again until I’m forced to really make her listen.
“I’m going to be fine,” I look up at her. “Mom.”
She gasps so loud that I’m afraid the entire state of California heard her. And then the water works start.
Oh boy.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Julian
“Man, this is all fucked up,” Cole mutters as he paces in front of me, wringing his fingers against his palms.
I’ve only ever seen the jerk worried a few times in my life, but right now, he’s not worried, he’s scared, which is even more unsettling.
“That was pretty fucked up,” Liam blows up angrily, disbelief coloring his words.
“Dude,” Cole agrees solemnly.
“That bastard was willing to sell Mia like a fucking doll at a yard fucking sell and at that age?” Liam snaps.
They’ve been going on about that since everything went down. Liam came in as soon as the cops left and now, he and Cole are going through everything that happened in Mia’s room as if with a fine tooth comb. And all it’s doing is making me tick like a fucking time bomb about to go off.
I haven’t said a word because honestly, there’s nothing I can say that would ease the horror of everything that happened to Mia and that fucking sucks.
Apparently, there’s blood on my hands—her blood—and because of that, I’ll forever suffer from it.
“Why the fuck are you just lying there, looking as cool as a fucking wilting cucumber in the sun?” Cole demands almost angrily. “You heard the questions those cops asked you, didn’t you?”
I can feel his stare on me, but I don’t look at him, choosing instead to stare up at the white ceiling, replaying the last thirty-six hours in my head like a hell loop.
“He’s not even here,” Cole mutters. “I can’t stand this bullshit.” Then I hear the door open and then shut with a bang.
“J!”
“Cole,” I mutter, feeling tired.
“Dude, are we in the same universe or are you silently losing it?” he demands sarcastically, waving his hand in front of my face.
I don’t have the fucking energy to tell him that I’ve been losing it since that text.
I don’t know how to tell him that since the day I met Mia Montague, I’ve been losing a bit of myself to her and now I’m just… empty.
There’s always been a void in me, sure, but the surest thing I fucking know right now, better than I know my own name, is that what happened to Mia, the horrors that are still unknown to me, it’s all my fucking fault and now, she has completely and effectively erased me from her soul.
I’m pissed at her amnesia, but if that gives her some kind of peace then, I swear to God I’ll do everything I can to protect that peace and let her be. Even if I’ll never be in her life again.
“Julian!”
“I said I’m fine,” I grit out, shifting in the fucking hospital bed but still uncomfortable.
“You’re fine my fucking black ass,” he grumbles unhappily. “You’re not fine. None of this is fine. They have your fucking useless wrist in cuffs, man.”
Ah yes.
I graduated from shiny cuffs in a wheelchair to shiny cuffs on the bed.
The same cop that was right outside my hospital door is still there, but this time, he looks more alert than before, you know, just in case my brother and my best friend decide to make do on their threat to bust me out of here like they’ve been saying for the past few hours after Mia woke up.
“It’s not my first time in these, you know that.” I jingle my left arm, trying my hardest not to think of my other arm that rests uselessly on the bed in a cast.
From the corner of my eye, I notice Cole glance at said arm worriedly and I know what he’s thinking, but I don’t want to think about that—let alone talk about it.
“Oh yeah sure, as opposed to your first time being accused of murder, huh?” he mutters distractedly, and I sigh.
“Sarcasm doesn’t suit you when you’re angry, dude,” I mutter tiredly.
“Being impassive doesn’t fit you when you’re in trouble, but fucking alas, here we are!”
Another heavy sigh escapes me.
Making Cole angry is never the best move. I wish he could just accept the new tune we’re dancing to now. It would make it all easier.
“Listen dude, your reaction to this is worrying and I need you to snap out of this,” he says.
“Cole…” I sigh.
“Seriously, what’s going on with you?” he demands.