Bitter Kisses (It's Just High School #3) - Thandiwe Mpofu Page 0,151

to step aside and let it.” He puts down a black envelope on the coffee table between us, then he steps back. “I hope one day you understand that for me to step aside and keep my promise to Nancy, some changes had to take place. I’m sorry it takes long but not even I have control over it. Either way, I hope you find it in your heart to fight for what’s always been.”

Then, he’s gone.

Liam and John leave Massachusetts the next morning. I had to convince my mom to go with them because I needed an extra day to finish packing the last of the stuff I have before I leave, but really, I needed the extra time to figure out what I wanted to do next.

Career wise, I know I’m headed to Med-school. Somewhere along the way during my time at MIT and all the re-runs of Grey’s Anatomy I’ve watched just to relate to the level of pain in that show in some way, I decided I want to be a neurosurgeon.

I’ve been accepted to top med-schools all over the country, but I still haven’t made a decision as to where I’m going next. I have no idea why I’m waiting but I know it has something to do with the black envelope John gave me.

I grab it, the urge to tear it open right there at my fingertips. I’m about to do it when my phone buzzes with an alert that my Uber is downstairs.

I grab my bags, give my cute apartment one last glance then I leave with my heart heavy.

Maybe I held back because I thought Julian would come for me, especially after listening to what Cole and John said. Or maybe I was deluding myself like I sometimes do.

So, in the spirit of graduation, I close the door behind me, drop the keys in my Landlady’s letter box, together with the rent she refused the last two years while I was here.

She was kind, always leaping to do above and beyond, but I don’t like the whole ‘I like you so much, you don’t have to pay rent here’ thing she had going on. It freaked me the fuck out.

On my way out the building, I spot a trashcan I remember Charlotte. One of the RACK girls, retched in after a night we drank like you wouldn’t believe. Yes, we somehow kept in touch over the past four years, but they never dropped their knack to just randomly show up. The last time though, Kendra wasn’t with them.

I walk over to the trashcan, grab the black envelope and rip it apart before I throw it in.

If Julian loved me, he wouldn’t have abandoned me like this

By the time my Uber drops me off at the airport, I make sure I have my Kindle paperwhite which has all the books I one-clicked but never managed to read yet.

I have my snacks ready, my Airpods are charged and I’m all checked in. I even score a free upgrade!

Thanks universe!

I sometimes have days like this, when I think I’m normal. That nothing happened to me and I’m just a regular girl trying to be positive and fool myself into thinking I’m doing just fine.

But the thing about pretending is, when you over do it, push will definitely come to shove, sooner or later and when you inevitably go crashing, you’ll fall so fucking hard, the pieces you were trying to glue back together will shatter even further.

And that’s me.

I know I’ve been trying to hold on to parts of me that still somehow work. Sometimes, I wrap my own arms around myself and fold into a small ball under my covers just to try and abate the cold chill that still hasn’t lifted from my bones.

When we board, I make my way to my seat, but suddenly, with each step I take, my heart starts pounding from out of nowhere.

The hairs at the back of my neck rise.

My insides start tingling with a strange sensation as I step forward. The last time I had this feeling, Julian ambushed me on when I wanted to get away, advised by that bitch, Courtney.

I look behind me, then back at the First-Class cabin. It’s filling up slowly of course, so why am I about to freak-out?

I’m practically persona non grata to Julian now, after he fucked me when I was all but comatose. Or maybe that’s how I decided to table it? I mean I have an amazing