The Suburban is fired up before I’ve even got my door closed all the way, and we’re pulling away from the curb.
I take out my phone and glance through emails before dialing Liz again. It goes to voice mail once more, but this time, I don’t bother leaving a message. I’ll just demon dial her until she answers as soon as I’m done with this errand.
And I find a few new text messages inside a group chat with my closest guy friends.
Thatch: Poker night is tonight, and you clowns better be there.
Kline: This has to be the twentieth text message you’ve sent about poker night in the last twenty-four hours. We get it, T. It’s tonight. We’ll be there.
Wes: You planning on sending out invitations you got off Etsy next? Make us RSVP and shit?
Thatch: Don’t tempt me. I’ll send a singing-fluffing-telegram to your office, Whitney.
Smartasses. The whole lot of ’em. I laugh to myself and continue reading the rest of the exchange.
Trent: We’ll be there, Thatch. We’ve all said we’d be there one million times.
Milo: Well, most of us will be there. Cap might not be able to come because he’s swamped at work. Liz is out on maternity leave, but I think his new assistant Hillary might be able to play a few rounds once she finishes up margs with the girls.
Fucking bastard. I roll my eyes and type out a response.
Me: Aw, poor Milo. Are you feeling insecure because I hung up on you? You know ole Cap still loves you, sweetheart.
Milo: Aw, thanks, honey. That means a lot. And you know what? Don’t be too hard on yourself that you’re currently out running your own errands because your new assistant left work early and is busy consuming her first marg…
Me: Funny fucking ha-ha.
Sadly, he’s not far off from my reality, but he doesn’t need to know that.
Of course, though, my bastard friends aren’t finished trying to razz me.
Thatch: Cap, before you get too busy running your own errands, can you give me Hillary’s number so I can call her and see if she’ll fill in for you? We can’t be short a player.
Me: You bastards better bring extra money tonight because I’m going to clean you the fuck out.
I lock the screen of my phone and grin.
I’m a fucking corporate lawyer. My poker face is aces, and there’s no doubt I will steal all their damn money tonight.
Yeah, but first, you’re going to go to the fucking law library to do the kind of research that, at this point in your career, you should be paying other people to do for you…
“Fuck this day,” I huff with a sigh. I haven’t been to the library to do my own research in at least five years.
Shit, probably more.
I’m fairly confident I’ll figure it out, but this is a real pain in my ass. I’m not at this place in my career anymore. I’ve worked ninety-hour weeks for the majority of the last several years to make sure of it.
We pull up in front of the architecturally impressive building that houses the library, and Vinny hits the locks. After years of working for me, he knows I won’t wait for him to come to my door and doesn’t even bother attempting the formality.
I shove out and jog to the front door, holding its heavy, nine-foot weight open for a woman exiting and flashing her a smile. She blushes, and some of the bitterness I feel because of Hillary disappears.
In general, I love women.
Love talking with them, working with them, listening to them, looking at them…and goddamn, do I love fucking them.
Bent over, leg lifted, missionary, cowgirl, wheelbarrow, doggy style, spooning, in the shower, against the wall—I’ll fuck a woman any way, anywhere, and I’ll make sure it’s the best goddamn sex she’s had in her whole entire life.
That’s what makes it so offensive when someone like Hillary comes along and puts absolutely no effort into her intelligence. It gives the rest of the female population of goddesses a generalized bad name, and quite frankly, it gives me a fucking headache.
I pass by the marble front desk in a hurry, but my swift stride does nothing to stop me from noticing the stunning woman sitting behind it. With blond hair, soft skin, and a pink-and-black-flowered sundress slipping off the edge of one petite shoulder, she has her head down and is tucked toward her phone with a pair of earbuds in her ears.