her dry lip. This is a blatant lie, but I don’t press. “I’m just tired. Would it be okay if I stayed here?” She tugs her long sleeves over her tiny hands, toying with the ends nervously.
“Of course.” I open the door wider, inviting her in. As she ambles in, it almost appears an effort for her to move.
“Want to have a slumber party?” I ask when she stands timidly near the doorway.
“But it’s daytime.” She cocks her head in confusion.
“Who says?” I slide the heavy blinds closed, shrouding us in darkness. Her happiness is palpable, which warms my heart.
We both bounce into bed, and five minutes later, Sadie is snoring softly beside me. A contented sigh leaves her when I wrap my arm around her.
It appears we all crave human contact. Sometimes, a single touch is all the medicine we need.
That has my thoughts wandering to Roman and our interaction earlier. He’s been there for me even when I didn’t want him to be. I want to do the same for him. I suddenly remember the Yankees baseball I saw in his office.
He’s stuck here twenty-four seven, so I doubt he’s even seen a game this season.
As gently as I can, I reach for my phone off the dresser, not wanting to disturb Sadie. I pull up the Yankees homepage and click on the tickets tab. As I read carefully over the schedule, one date stands out. It’s Roman’s birthday. It’s a home game, and it’s also on a Saturday night.
He can stay overnight if he doesn’t want to make the commute back here after the game. Or he could make a night of it with a friend. Or someone special.
I grit my teeth at the thought. But I can’t be selfish and presume he’ll go alone. It’s his birthday, for god’s sake. No one should spend their birthday alone; regardless of how opposed they are to celebrating it.
Decision made, I allow the webpage to choose the best seats available and enter my credit card details. Two tickets are emailed to my inbox minutes later.
I feel good about my spontaneity and hope Roman does too.
When Sadie woke, we spent the entire afternoon laughing, taking stupid selfies, and watching movie after movie. It was the best afternoon I’ve had in a long time. But now, the pain twisting my stomach into knots has me wanting to curl into a ball and die. It’s been roughly two hours since Sadie left, and Roman texted me, reminding me to take my next dose. I did, and now I’m feeling the effects tenfold.
It started with sudden dizziness, followed by nausea.
I stand, needing to move as I’m getting motion sickness sitting down. The moment I rise, however, I collapse onto the floor, muting my groan behind my palm. It feels like a thousand knives are marching a circle around my stomach, not satisfied until I’m bled dry.
Curling into a ball, I tuck my arms around myself. A fierce pain tears through my body, and I taste blood as I bite down on my tongue to mute my cries.
I can do this, I repeat endless times. I’ve lived through worse. That may be true, but my mind has purposely forgotten this level of agony, never wanting to relive such torture.
Sweat coats my body, but I feel like I’m caught naked in a snowstorm. The nausea comes in violent waves, so brutal I almost black out from the pain. I almost wish I would.
Silently dragging myself along the floor, I reach overhead, hoping my fingers will pass over my cell sitting on my dresser. When they do, I squeak in relief.
Squinting, hoping the action will help clear my blurry vision, I hold the phone out in front of me. The screen moves in and out of focus, but the moment it clears, I type the only word I can. The only word he’ll understand.
Sunflower.
The phone slips from my palm, and my head hits the carpet as I fold into a heap. It’s quiet here, the pain thrumming in the background. Everything is so cluttered—chunks of reality slipping from my palms. I don’t know where I am or who I am anymore. But I can’t help but think that maybe it’s where I was always destined to land.
I don’t realize I’m throwing up until my throat screams at me, the burn almost rendering me unconscious once again.
“Don’t you dare! Fight, Lola. Stay awake!”
My eyes pop open, his voice the only anchor I need to slip back into