grin only grows wide. I climb on and she uses my shoulders as anchors as she swings a leg on and slides behind me. Her body curves along mine like two adjacent puzzle pieces and the heat of her body immediately warms my entire back.
“Hold on tight, okay?” I say.
She presses even closer, I start the bike and we’re off.
As soon as the wind is whipping my face, I start to relax and think, and my first thought, as it so often is, is of the woman pressed to my back, with her arms wrapped trustingly around my waist.
Meeting her now, feeling this way about her, finding so much comfort in her, being unable to stop thinking about her - all of that happening at this moment in my life, feels like very shitty timing.
I’ve learned a lot of things in the last year as I’ve had to navigate some of the most difficult moments of my life. And one of the very first lessons I learned is that often, what appears to be shitty timing, in hindsight, proves to be exactly the opposite.
So, I’m not going to wait for hindsight to show me what I missed because I was afraid. I’m going all in.
28
DID I DIE?
BETH
“Beth…you okay?” Carter asks, as I try for a third time to put my key into the lock of my front door.
“My fingers are a little stiff from hanging on for dear life,” I quip, and take a deep breath to steady my nerves.
I was full of bravado when I climbed on behind him wrapping my arms around the solid warmth of his body. I thought he’d shield me. But during our ride home, as I replayed the events that just occurred, I’d lost all of it.
What had I done? There was no way that fight wasn’t going to come back to haunt me. I had already resolved to tell Duke that I didn’t want to do this anymore. Tonight, people saw me with Carter and there’s no going back to pretending that Duke and I are a happy couple.
I’ve embarrassed him and my father.
I’ll have to face the music for that and I have no idea what that’s going to look like.
“Let me help me you.” Carter’s hands close around mine and we unlock and push open the door together.
It’s such a small thing, but it’s enough to remind me that I’m not doing this alone. When the sun comes up, I’ll deal with the fallout.
Tonight, I’m going to feast on the first truly wonderful thing to happen to me in a long time.
This man, beautiful, strong, talented, smart, kind and so very honest wants me. Loves me.
He stays close to me as we step inside and I start to turn on the lights downstairs and then I stop. I turn to face him, unsure of what I’m going to say.
The deep growl in the back of his throat is the last thing I hear before his lips crash down on mine.
The touch is so electric, so fucking hot. When my lips part on a gasp, his tongue sweeps inside. Like a pillaging pirate looking for his lost treasures, he plunders my mouth.
My body lights up instantly and desire floods. Inhibitions, fears are eviscerated by my need for him. I’m completely at the mercy of it and there’s nothing he can’t take from me.
Nothing I don’t want to give him.
Nowhere I don’t want to feel him.
I am so done denying myself.
His kiss, minty and sweet, consumes me and I never want to breathe again if it means his lips won’t be on mine.
Need races like wildfire through my veins and I’m sure that I’m dying.
The hand in my hair contracts as his strong arm wraps around my waist and pulls me up and sits me on the table. He shoves his hands into my jeans and palms my ass, his fingers slide between my cheeks finding the slickness that his touch is inspiring. He runs his coated finger around the tight pucker of my asshole and then presses in.
“I want to fuck you here, my Beth. Will you let me?”
“You can have me anywhere. I’m all yours.”
I rock my hips, press my chest into his, hold his head still so that I can feast on his mouth while he shows me a new kind of pleasure.
I cry out as his finger probes me and he groans into my mouth.
We’ve gone from zero to sixty and the insistent press of his cock into the