Beguiled (The Fairest Maidens #2) - Jody Hedlund Page 0,37

retreating to wherever he’d been before we’d made him aware of our presence.

I didn’t care about the soldier, didn’t care about our rescue mission, didn’t care about the peril hovering around every corner. All I could think about was Mikkel kissing me and that I didn’t want him to stop.

His lips and his touch had unearthed in me a wellspring of emotions I couldn’t begin to name, so when he broke the kiss, I clutched his tunic and held him in place. My movement must have given him some kind of permission to continue, because he seized my mouth again with a fervor that sent tingles over my skin and down my backbone.

As though forcing himself, he broke away and leaned his head against the wall so our cheeks brushed. “We have to go,” he whispered breathlessly. “Before he comes back and asks more questions.”

I nodded, too overwhelmed to say anything. Who could have guessed that kissing Mikkel would be like this? My legs shook beneath me, hardly able to hold me up. And as I released his garment, my fingers trembled.

In spite of his admonition to be on our way, he didn’t make an effort to move. Instead, his presence surrounded me. His scruffy cheek pressed to mine, and his ragged breathing filled my ear, sending more tremors through me.

“Pearl.” His voice filled with something I could only describe as wanting. Was it possible these kisses hadn’t been pretend for him either? Was it possible he was feeling the same desire for me that I was for him?

My heartbeat tapped out an uncertain rhythm. What did this mean for our relationship? And where did we go from here?

“Pearl.” This time he pulled slightly away. “You must—you need to—”

I waited for him to tell me what to do next. He obviously had more practice at relationships than I did and would know how to proceed.

“You have to put your veil back on,” he finished.

I stiffened. “Why?”

“It’s just better that way.”

Better for whom? For him? So he didn’t have to chance seeing my so-called blemish? I pushed him away and, at the same time, tugged up the veil.

“Don’t be upset,” he whispered. “If the guards see your flaws, they’ll know who we are and that we’ve come for the women.”

“Or maybe you have no wish to see who I really am because you fear you will not like how I look.” The hurt welling up inside pushed me to taunt and test him. Was he so shallow he couldn’t abide seeing my face? If that was the case, I would keep myself hidden from him.

“That’s not it.” But the hint of uncertainty in his voice told me he was indeed afraid of finally seeing the real woman he’d married.

I shoved his chest, forcing him to take a step back. Then I turned away from him as I tied the veil into place.

Behind me, he released an exasperated breath. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have allowed us to get so carried away—”

“I was only pretending, as you asked of me.” I spun around and glared at him, his rejection stinging. “You need not flatter yourself into thinking I liked kissing you.” I had more than liked it. I’d adored it. But I couldn’t allow him to think so and pity me.

Any response he might have had ready, he let fade to silence.

I cinched the veil strings, putting the barrier back between us where it belonged. Disappointment wedged there too. Always before, I’d had to wonder if the men at court could see beyond my beauty and royalty and appreciate my other qualities. And now I faced the same problem, only slightly different. Could men—particularly Mikkel—see beyond my veil and perceived ugliness to like me for who I was on the inside?

The truth was, I didn’t want to be loved for what I looked like for either the good or the bad. I wanted to be loved for who I was. Was that too much to ask?

Chapter

13

Mikkel

I turned away from Pearl to allow her to finish tying her veil into place. All the while, my pulse slammed hard through my veins with a sizzling heat.

What had just happened between us?

At the sight of the guard, I’d panicked and taken the first excuse that came to mind—the only one I could think of for why a man and woman would be out so early in the morn together: that we were helplessly in love with each other.

I’d thought pretending at kissing would prove our ruse.