Been There Done That (Leffersbee #1) - Hope Ellis Page 0,81
again, finally. I wanted to run my hands through it, grip it, pull it, punish him just a little. Or a lot.
I realized I was staring into space. Cold sweat trickled down my spine as I imagined just how good it would feel to have him inside me again, my walls clenching around him as I came.
Damn.
Leigh looked smug. “You’re over there getting off without your hands in your pants. Time to face reality. I put backup condoms in your purse and bedside table.”
Chapter Nineteen
Zora
“Thank you for coming.”
I slid into the opposite side of the booth where Nick sat, at once both treacherous and delicious in a plaid shirt rolled above his elbows. His dark stubble had taken on an increased volume and depth that made my stomach pitch dangerously. Those unnerving green eyes crawled over my body in a slow sweep, and I couldn’t shake the impression that he was somehow collecting data, storing observations that would be used against me in short order.
Meep.
Pull it together. Don’t be dumb for a man. Especially one who has already proven he can’t be trusted.
I’d pulled on a quick, no-ironing-required paisley dress that showcased my best assets before driving to Kaye’s, a cute little coffee shop straddling the Green Valley-Knoxville border. Might as well be cute when dismissing him from my life for the final time, right? I hadn’t missed the flare of appreciation in Nick’s eyes as I approached the table.
Yeah, this thing between us? It had to stop.
“You didn’t give me much of a choice,” I said in response to his greeting, tossing my purse on the bench seat beside me.
“Actually, I gave you exactly that. I simply made it clear that I had no problem showing up at your house or wherever you were tonight at this time.” His eyes burned into mine. “It’s time to talk. We have to, without any dramatic exits this time.”
“You know, at least one of those exits was yours.”
“Regardless.” He lifted one well-built shoulder in a shrug.
“Well, I agree. We need to get on the same page.”
He nodded at the empty space in front of me. “What, you don’t want any coffee? Pastry? Anything? Whatever you want, it’s yours.”
I suppressed a shiver, internally shocked at my own lascivious read of his very innocent statement. Yep, I was in trouble. “Nope. I just want to get this said.”
“Okay. Go for it.” He took a sip from his own cup of coffee, looking supremely confident. Watching his remarkable calm, I found myself wanting to kick the shit out of him under the table and make him feel a little of the tumult currently acid-washing my gut.
I’d rehearsed this speech a number of times out in the car, but I found myself suddenly out of words. I looked away from his eyes and out the window to the wet street. After Leigh’s warning, I realized I was, in fact, dangling over the precipice of my own ruin. I considered myself a smart, practical woman who usually heeded warnings and steered clear of unnecessary risks. So, I found it unnerving to realize that deep down a part of me wanted to hear the sharp clang of metal teeth closing around me in Nick’s trap. A part of me wanted to be caught, wanted to surrender to the dark intent in Nick’s eyes. Even though I knew better. After his declaration yesterday in my office where he left no question that he wouldn’t settle for friendship, I knew I had to be clear. I had to put distance between us. Permanently.
“I told you I was proud of you. And I meant that. I’m glad you’re doing so well in life. It’s more than we’d ever dreamed of, what you’ve accomplished.”
“Here comes the but.”
“Don’t interrupt.”
“Fine.”
“But . . . it doesn’t give you license to just walk back into my life like you’d never left. We’re not eighteen anymore—I get that. It’s not exactly fair to hold you to the promises we made as teenagers. At least, that’s what I keep telling myself. But the truth is,” I said, letting some of the angst and irritation bleed into my voice, “you owed me more, even at eighteen. A hell of a lot more than what I got. A five-line letter? Some half-ass explanation that you had to go and you’d be back, with no indication of when? Even teenage you could have managed a damn sight more than that.”
His eyes closed, big hands curling around his coffee cup.