He should have been gentler with her, more of a husband than a hard-bitten businessman with a bitter past. His churlish display had upset her, alienated her, and he regretted that. He hadn’t meant to make her cry. Being the cause of her misery, he knew he was in for a delicate round of diplomacy. ‘Beatrice?’
She started violently at the sound of his voice. Snapping her head up, she dashed her tears away with the back of her hand and, picking up her hairbrush, began brushing her hair vigorously.
‘What do you want?’ she managed to say, her voice flat.
‘To apologise.’
This was not what Beatrice had expected. Her eyes met his in the mirror and her lips twisted wryly. ‘You? Apologise? Is the callous attitude you used on me earlier supposed to be endearing? Is this what I am to expect in the future if I unwittingly transgress?’
‘This is how I am, Beatrice. I am not perfect.’
‘No, you’re not.’ She sighed despondently, tired of the argument. ‘It doesn’t matter. You were right. I’ve been a fool, a stupid fool for thinking that by marrying you I would bring Larkhill back into my life, and now I shall have to live with the consequences of my stupidity.’
Julius’s heart turned over when he looked at her reflection in the mirror and saw the wounded look in her glorious green eyes. Going to stand behind her, he stilled her hand and took the brush from her, taking on the task of brushing the long silken mass himself.
Beatrice made no move to stop him. She just sat quietly, watching him through the vanity mirror. The image of his tall, masculine frame occupied with such a feminine task enabled her to manage a weak smile.
‘You missed your vocation, Julius. You would have made a good lady’s maid.’
He grinned leisurely. ‘I would be only too happy to stand in when your maid is absent.’ He paused and gazed into her eyes. ‘Why were you crying?’
‘Because I couldn’t help it. I am ashamed of myself. I was crying for my own ineptitude, my incompetence and my inability to manage my own life.’
‘I don’t agree. I think you have a natural talent for all three. You’re being too harsh on yourself, Beatrice. Your aunt made it clear that you were not particularly welcome in her house, therefore you had no desire to stay where you were not wanted. But without means where could you go? You yearned for your old home, which was the only place where you had known happiness, and you saw me as a means of getting it back. I cannot blame you for that.’
‘You don’t?’
‘No, I don’t.’ He experienced a feeling of comprehension, for while he had been struggling with his own life, her world had also been falling apart. At least now he had an insight of what lay behind her fear and dread, and what had driven her to do what she had.
‘Nevertheless, I can see how, by my actions, I have humiliated and embarrassed you. I should not have done that. I thought of no one but myself. You can divorce me if you like. I wouldn’t blame you.’
Julius stiffened. ‘Is that what you want?’
She sighed dejectedly, looking down at her hands. ‘It no longer matters what I want. The choice is yours, Julius.’
Putting the brush down, Julius turned and walked slowly across the room to the window, where he stood looking out. Divorce! It was unthinkable. He could not imagine having to go back to the way his life had been before he had met Beatrice—back to the darkness, the loneliness, the endless isolation, the despair, though he would never admit it to anyone. To be with Beatrice now, to have known her as a husband knows his wife and then to have her walk away, that would reduce him to a wretched creature who had been cast out. Whatever it took, he knew he would do anything to keep her with him.
Recovering his composure, he said firmly, ‘There will be no divorce.’
Beatrice stared at her image for a moment as relief washed over her. Closing her eyes, she tried to gather her thoughts, to know what to say, what to think. Julius had never spoken of how much he cared for her, not even pretended to. She wasn’t certain of his feelings—she wasn’t certain of her own, either. All she really knew was that the sight of his hard, handsome face and the bold amber eyes never failed to make