Rocco and Enzo looked mildly disappointed when Nicoli quickly agreed, but I could see that he was getting overwhelmed, not to mention Winter’s discomfort.
“We can just chill out and take things from there.” I pointed them down the corridor to their right and as Nicoli led Winter along it, I shot my other brothers a dark glare.
We’d be having words when I got back from settling them in about how to deal with this sensitively. I hadn’t gone this far to find Angelo only to have him run from us again. This had to go right or it was all going to fall apart. We had our brother back. And I intended to make sure he stayed for good this time.
I lay by the wall on the floor of the huge bedroom Frankie had gifted me, the door open so I could see out into the hall and know that I wasn’t locked in. The single blanket I’d taken from the bed was silken soft and hugged my skin. My bruises had turned a sour shade of yellow, but the cuts were healing well and the pain had eased so much that I barely noticed it now. And yet sleep still wouldn't come. The Romeros had left us here alone for the night and I had a feeling that was to do with me, because as much as I wanted to trust them, I couldn’t relax in a house full of men I didn’t know. And something told me they understood that. I just hoped I wasn’t always going to remain this broken.
When my eyelids fluttered closed, I saw Duke leaning over me with a belt wrapped around his hand. I saw his sneer and even when I tried to picture him dead, I couldn't. Seeing no body meant I couldn't put my nightmares of him to rest. And maybe that meant he would always be with me. The final dagger in my heart, forever twisting and drawing blood. It was better than before though. The ghosts of the others were gone. I was at peace when it came to them at least...
The air-con stirred my hair and I shivered. I'd been unsure of how to turn the thing off and it seemed to be set to some sub-zero temperature colder than the mountain we'd left behind. I curled up tighter on the hard wood and searched for peace somewhere inside me, but it wouldn't come. My past was awake tonight, clawing its way through my mind and bringing me to the mercy of Duke again and again. I could almost feel him striking that belt, splitting skin. He never stopped until I screamed, but I always held out for as long as possible. He'd build up a sweat then peel off his coat and light a cigarette, the heavy scent making me cough. He'd chained my hands to the table once and struck them with a cane until my knuckles had bled and every inch of my pale skin had turned red raw.
"What's the code?"
"What's the code?"
"What's the motherfucking code!?"
I flinched as a hand pressed to my arm, then relaxed as I recognised Nicoli, turning my head and opening my eyes to look at him. He was shirtless, his breath minty and a deep V was etched between his eyes. "Will you do something for me, baby doll? One favour?”
I opened my mouth, but my voice had been buried even deeper than usual by Duke haunting me so I gave up and nodded.
"Sleep in with me, in my room. I want to watch over you. And if you can, please sleep in the bed."
My heart knotted at his words. They terrified me in a way that something so normal shouldn't have. But I knew what he was asking was only for my benefit. Sleeping on the floor was a chain that still bound me to The Five. The only way I'd felt any semblance of safe in my cell at night was being tucked against a wall. But a bed? Sleeping in a bed with Nicoli... I loved the sound of it, I really did. The reality wasn't so easy though.
"Just try," Nicoli implored. "And if you don't like it, then I'll sleep on the floor with you. I know you don't need me close, but I...well fuck if I haven't gotten used to you being close. I don't think I can sleep without you near now."