She continues staring at the TV, and just when I think I’ve failed to connect with her again, she faces me and says, “I’m sorry. I’m not intentionally pulling away.”
Thank fuck for that.
“Do you want to see someone?”
She frowns. “A psychologist?”
“Yeah. Someone you can talk to.”
“Maybe.”
I move to sit on the bed. “I think it’s a good idea.”
She glances down at the bed, stalling with what she wants to say. “How do you feel about doing another IVF cycle?”
“I thought that was a given.”
Her eyes are full of doubt and confusion when she meets my gaze again. “I know, but that was before we started all this. I wasn’t sure if you feel the same way after everything we’ve been through.”
“Nothing has changed for me. If you think you can handle another round, I’m all in. If you’re out, we’ll move to our next option.”
“Well, I won’t need the hormones next time, so it won’t be as bad or as expensive.”
We froze two eggs this time, so I’m hopeful we can get pregnant without Birdie having to do the hormone shots again. At this point, though, I’m just as concerned about her mental health if we’re not successful.
“You want to go again?” I ask.
“Yes.”
“Decision made, then. We’ll do it again.”
She places her hand over mine, her touch like a hit of oxygen. “I never thought anything would hurt as much as losing my last tube and then losing you, but this”—she swallows hard—“has killed me. I don’t want to shut you out. Please don’t give up on me if it feels like I am.”
My phone rings. I ignore it because this is the first time Birdie has opened up all week.
“Baby, I’ve told you before, that’s never going to happen. I’m in this with you for life.”
Her shoulders sag and tears stream down her face. A moment later, she crawls into my lap, wrapping her arms around me. “Thank you.”
My phone rings again, but fuck me, I’ve got my woman in my arms; no fucking way am I answering it. Whoever it is can wait.
Her lips come to mine, and she lights my whole damn world up with a kiss that I feel every bit of her heart in. When she drags her mouth from mine, she looks at me through her tears and says, “I love how you love me. And I’m good now if you need to be all practical. I’m not the only one hurting; you do whatever you need to do to pull yourself out of the darkness, even if that means trying to fix shit that maybe can’t be fixed. And I’ll try to be there for you as much as you’re here for me.” When my phone rings again, she says, “I think maybe you should answer that.”
I wipe her tears, regretful as hell to have to let her go so I can answer this damn call. But the caller is persistent, and that doesn’t fill me faith that this call is just a casual chat, so I leave her to grab my phone.
Ransom.
I put my phone to my ear. “What’s up, brother?”
His voice is full of savage anger when he says, “Ice is dead. It was Zenith. I have the guys who did it.”
My entire body turns to stone.
“Where are you?”
“At the warehouse.”
“I’m on my way.”
I end the call and look at Birdie with an apology I wish like fuck I didn’t have to give.
She speaks before I do. “You have to go out.”
I nod. “Yeah. And I’ll be a while.”
She smiles, and I know she’s trying hard to let me know this is okay. Fuck, I love her. “I guess that means we’ll need a rain check for dinner.”
I brush a kiss over her lips. “Yeah, we do.”
I quickly dress and leave for the warehouse. It takes me a good half hour to get there, and by the time I arrive, I barely recognise my own thoughts. Killing two of my men and wounding more, coupled with being the reason I haven’t been as available for my wife as I would have liked over the last month, has me ready for blood in a way I never have been.
“What happened?” I demand when I locate Ransom.
“They went to his house and slit his throat. The only reason we got them was because Hunt showed up as they were leaving. He shot them both in the leg to slow them down, knowing you’d want time with them rather them