Bared Souls - Ellie Wade Page 0,77

“I think Quinn and I are cooling off,” he says, as if reading my thoughts.

“Yeah?”

“We haven’t seen each other in a long time, and to be honest, I don’t miss her, you know? We had a lot of fun this year, but I don’t know if it’s deeper than that. Maybe we’re best as friends,” he says.

“With benefits?” I quirk up a brow, causing Amos to laugh.

“If she wants. I mean, I’m down.” He shrugs with a smug grin.

I’m sure they’ll have all sorts of benefits flying around after the party tonight. They’ll probably be needing the shower for a good long time.

Amos glances at my bed and notices all of the gifts and baskets on it. He squints and walks over. “Is this stuff from …” His voice trails off as he picks up the envelope stuffed with concert tickets.

“Yeah,” I respond immediately. No use in denying it.

Amos’s face jerks toward mine, his eyes angry. “You’re not back together with him. Are you?”

“No.” I shake my head with a glance toward my feet.

“Alma, please tell me you’re not thinking about going back to him.” His voice is stern but pleading.

I let out a sigh. “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?” His voice rises an octave, and honestly, it’s the first time in my life I can remember that happening. Amos is always cool as a cucumber, especially with me.

I raise my palms, urging him to calm. “Don’t get upset. I don’t know. There are a lot of things that you don’t know about him. A great deal of information has come to light fairly recently that’s changed the way I think of him. He’s a good person, Amos, and he’s sorry. He was in rehab for months, and now, he’s in NA—Narcotics Anonymous—and seeking help. He’s better … and I miss him.”

Amos closes his eyes and rubs his temples. “I can’t believe you right now.” He shakes his head before looking to me, confusion in his stare. “You grew up with druggies, Alma. You know what that life is like. I get that you miss him, and that’s okay, but you’re not weak. You’re the strongest person I know. You’re better than Leo in every way. Don’t sell yourself short. You saw him. We both did. You know what he was involved in. It made you literally sick. Don’t forget that because I’m telling you right now that an addict is always an addict. It’s just a matter of time before he slips again. You deserve better than that, and you know it. Getting back together with Leo isn’t just getting back together with the parts you love. It’s all of it. You’d be dating that person we saw high as a kite in that crack house because … that is who he is.”

I shake my head. “It’s not though.” My voice trembles. “You don’t know him.”

“Yes, I do. I think it’s you who’s forgotten what a monster he can be.” Amos paces the room. “Please don’t take him back, Alma. I’m begging you. He will break your heart over and over again. I know you loved him, and that’s hard to get over, but you have to be strong.”

“I’m sorry. You just can’t understand. There are things about him that you don’t know, and I can’t tell you. He’s a good person, and he loves me more than anyone else could possibly love me.”

“Are you fucking serious right now?” Amos shouts, and I take a step back.

He’s never yelled at me or been this angry with me our entire lives. The rage explodes from him, filling the room with a tension so thick that I’m choking on it. It’s hard to pull in a deep breath. I start to cry as anguish squeezes my heart. I understand his anger, but I can’t promise him that I won’t go back to Leo because I honestly don’t know.

Amos flinches when I take a step away from him and shakes his head, his fists clenching at his sides. He looks to me, broken. “You have a really warped idea of what love is. I thought I knew you, but you’re different. I don’t think I know you anymore.” He steps toward the door.

“Wait,” I cry. “Please don’t go.”

“I have to leave, or I’m going to end up saying something I’ll really regret. Once words are spoken, they’re out there forever. Some words are really hard to forgive, Alma.” He opens the door and leaves me alone—something he has never done.

Quinn returns to