Bang (Blast Brothers #2) - Sabrina Stark Page 0,73
studied the display. I had a text. It was from Mason.
Oddly enough, it was identical to the one Arden had sent me earlier in the night. It said, "Can you talk?"
I blew out a long, trembling breath. I could. I just didn't know if I wanted to.
I was still trying to decide when my cellphone buzzed again. It was another text, also from Mason. This one said, "You were right."
I bit my lip. Right about what?
During that tense phone conversation, I'd said a lot of things. And so had he. Some of those things stung, even now.
And if I were being totally honest, I wasn't just hurting over the thing he'd said about us not being friends. I was hurt by the way he'd coldly informed me that he wasn't my boyfriend.
As if I expected him to be.
The idea was completely ludicrous. He and I were total opposites. He was hard. I was soft. He was tough. I was a peace-maker by nature. He was rich. I wasn't exactly poor. But compared to him?
Oh yeah, I was a total pauper.
In my darkened bedroom, I was still staring at his latest message. I was dying to know what he meant, but dreaded the thought of going another ten rounds with my impossible boss.
In the end, I decided to split the difference by texting him back. "Right about what?"
His reply came almost immediately. "You're awake."
"Maybe."
"Can I call you?"
Huh. That was weird. Mason was the kind of guy who didn't ask permission – well, other than the time we'd gotten frisky in the pantry. But that was a total anomaly in more ways than one.
I was still trying to come up with a decent response when my phone buzzed yet again. "Say yes."
And right on the heels of that text, came another. "You know you want to."
I felt my lips twitch like they wanted to smile. But I shouldn't be smiling. Mason had been totally awful. And yet, judging from his texts, he was willing to meet me more than halfway.
After all, I wasn't telling him that he was right – because he wasn't.
In the end, curiosity won out. I didn't give him a "yes," but I did send him a text with two little letters. "Ok."
I'd barely hit "send" when my phone buzzed with his incoming call. Bracing myself, I answered with a quiet, "Hey."
His voice was quiet, too. "Hey."
It felt so embarrassingly good to hear his voice, although for the life of me, I couldn't figure out why. "So…What's up?"
"There's something I need to tell you."
"Oh yeah? What's that?"
"You were right."
"So I hear. But about what?"
He paused for a long moment before saying, "I was an asshole, just like you said."
I frowned. "But I never said that."
In a tone that was almost teasing, he said, "Didn't you?"
And then, it hit me. "Oh, my God. You heard that?"
"Heard it. And digested it." With a faint laugh, he added, "Deserved it, too."
I could hardly believe my ears. Still, I had to tell him, "Just so you know, I didn't mean for you to hear that. I was talking to myself."
"Why? You're not the asshole." When he spoke next, his voice was nearly a caress. "Cami?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm so fucking sorry. I know you don't like swear words, but it's the only way I can tell you. The things I said – I did a sorry job of it. You deserve better."
I felt myself swallow. "Really?"
"You know it's true," he said. "And you wanna know what I just figured out?"
By now, I was nearly breathless. "What?"
"If I could love anyone, it would be you."
My heart lifted, and then sank as I digested the full implication of his words. On the surface, it was such a sweet sentiment. But deep inside, where it counted, I wasn't so sure. "What do you mean?"
"I mean, I don't believe in it."
"In what?"
"Love."
My breath hitched. "Oh."
"And I like you too much to lie."
By now, I was chewing on my bottom lip. He liked me.
So we were friends after all?
I should've been happy. But when I searched my heart, I found no happiness, just disappointment, which made no sense whatsoever. We weren't even a couple. I heard myself say, "I never expected you to love me."
"No. But you would eventually."
"You don't know that."
"I do," he said. "And I like you too much to hurt you."
There it was again. He liked me.
From Mason, it was a huge compliment. So why did I feel so empty?