all he did was sit there. He didn’t have the words, much less the breath, to speak.
This was the woman he was going to spend the rest of his life with. After putting off marriage for so long, he had finally taken the leap, only to have his bride ripped away from him.
The family he had put on hold so he could pursue his career had been within his grasp. He and Lara and Marco had been a perfect fit. She had lost her husband and Marco had lost his father. Harvath had arrived at the point where he was ready to take on both of those roles. But now it was all gone.
She was so smart, so beautiful, and so funny. What’s more, she had understood him. More important, she had understood why he did what he did and why it was so important. In short, she not only loved him, but she allowed him to be who he was.
Gripping her hand, he let it all come out. He let her know how much he loved her, how much he missed her, and how sorry he was that she was gone and that he had not been able to save her.
And as he did, the iron door to the dark, cold place swung the rest of the way open.
• • •
Still exhausted, he fell asleep in the chair next to her.
It was just before dawn when her voice came to him, and told him that it was time to wake up.
He lingered for a moment in that halfway place between sleep and wakefulness, hoping she would say something more, that maybe she would tell him that everything was going to be okay, that she forgave him. He waited, but no further words came.
Looking at his watch, he saw that he would have barely enough time to make it back to his hotel to change before meeting up with Lara’s parents at their apartment.
As he had been at the safe house in Maryland and wanted to catch the first available flight to Boston, Sloane had been kind enough to go to his house, pack him a bag, and bring it to him at the airport.
Though she had taken creative license on similar errands in the past, this time she was incredibly respectful—white shirt, black shoes, black tie, and black suit. She had even included a black overcoat, as well as a couple extra days’ worth of subdued clothing.
She had also been thoughtful enough to include a heartfelt note of support. Everyone on the team, including Nicholas and even McGee, loved Lara. She was someone very special. All of them would have made the trip to Boston to be there for her funeral, but Harvath had asked them not to. Out of respect for him, they had all stayed back in D.C.
Upon arriving at Lara’s parents’ house, Marco had thrown his arms around Harvath and hadn’t wanted to let go. There was a spark of his mother in him and it felt better than Harvath could have ever imagined to hold the little boy close.
After the burial, when they arrived at the hall where the wake was to take place, Harvath looked out the window of their limo at the steady stream of strangers parading in.
These were people Lara and her parents knew. None of them knew who he was. If the looks he had gotten at the mass and at the burial were any indication, he was not going to be very warmly received here either. On top of that, this was going to be wrenching for Marco.
Pulling his father-in-law aside, Harvath asked if he could take the little boy out to get something to eat and promised to bring him back to the apartment later. Lara’s mother and father had both agreed.
After the grandparents had exited the limo, he had the driver take them to a little Boston breakfast place Lara had loved.
Seeing the pair dressed in dark suits and ties, the hostess must have intuited where they were coming from, because she waved them over and found them a table ahead of the other people who had already been waiting. Harvath tried to give her a tip for her kindness, but she refused to take it.
Looking at the children’s menu, Marco had trouble deciding what to eat. Harvath told him that on a day like this pancakes were the right choice. He didn’t know why, other than that when his father had died, one of his father’s SEAL