The Avery Shaw Experiment - By Kelly Oram Page 0,42

eyes full of concern for me. “Of course I don’t think you played me. I know that’s not what that kiss was about. You were trying to help me. Just because it didn’t work doesn’t mean I’m mad at you for it.”

“But do you regret it?”

It took her a minute to answer. She couldn’t meet my eyes, and when she spoke, it was so quiet that if she hadn’t shaken her head, I might not have understood her.

“No. I don’t think so.”

When I let out a breath, I realized how much I’d needed that answer. I didn’t like the “think so” part, but at least it wasn’t a yes.

“Good,” I said. “Because I wouldn’t take it back for anything.”

She looked up at me again, surprised by my confession, and I asked her something I’d never asked any other girl before. “Will you be my girlfriend, Avery? Officially, I mean?”

Avery wasn’t the only person around the table to gasp. I did my best to hold her eyes with mine so that she wouldn’t pay attention to the people watching us and freak herself out.

“But . . .” Her shock turned to confusion. “You don’t do the girlfriend thing. You always say that. You’ve never had one before.”

“A guy can change his mind if the right girl comes along, can’t he?”

“Um . . .”

“I know I have a reputation.”

Someone snorted and a few others snickered, which really didn’t help my case any, but I was determined. “I’ve never been interested in a girlfriend before, Aves, but you make me want to try it. Will you give us chance?”

Pam and Chloe both sighed like I’d just said the most romantic thing in the world, but Avery didn’t melt like they did. She cast a quick glance toward the door that Aiden had just walked out of.

I suddenly wanted to punch something very, very badly. “You can’t possibly still want him.”

“It’s not that,” she said. “I’m just really mixed-up emotionally. I’m scared and confused and still just really, really hurt. I’m not over it. I’m not over him.”

“How can you not—”

“I want to be,” she said quickly, not letting me finish. “I try to be. I even thought I didn’t want him anymore for a while, but then he broke up with his girlfriend and some sick part of me that loves torture got hopeful.”

“Aves—”

She shook her head, still not letting me interrupt. “It’ll never happen. I know that. I’m past denial, remember? I hate that I feel this way. I hate that he can still affect me.”

She searched my face for understanding. “I would love nothing more than to say yes to you right now, but it would be in hopes that it would help get him out of my head, and that wouldn’t be fair to you. You deserve so much better than that. You deserve a girl whose whole heart is in it, not some permanently-damaged mental case.”

I had to read between the lines. She’d said no, but it wasn’t really a rejection.

“Okay,” I said. “Let’s say, hypothetically, that you weren’t damaged goods. If my brother weren’t in the picture, if I had been born an only child, if all you knew was me, would you consider being my girlfriend then?”

I braced myself for a real rejection.

“Grayson,” she said tiredly. “If that were the case, I wouldn’t have to consider it. I’d probably already be naming our future babies.”

I am not often taken by complete surprise, but that comment had me reeling.

Avery gave me a sad smile and slipped her arm around me. It was the first hug she’d given me since we kissed. “You have no idea how amazing you are. This is about me. I promise.”

I hugged her back and felt my smile spread from ear to ear. “All you had to do was say you weren’t ready,” I teased, wanting to lighten the atmosphere before she started dwelling on how miserable she felt again. “I can wait. We’ll get your heart all nice and patched up and then you can say yes to me.”

“If you actually manage to fix my heart, I’ll say yes to whatever you want.”

Avery was so innocent I know she didn’t mean that statement the way my brain interpreted it—she probably didn’t even realize it could be taken in such a way—but still, my mind went from zero to dirty in no time flat.

“Anything I want?” I laughed. “Will you do me a favor and put that in writing?”

She finally caught my meaning, and