Avery (The Phoenix Club Girl Diaries #3) - Addison Jane Page 0,16

to face him, his gaze dark and needy, his hand cupping my jaw. “I like seeing you like this.”

“Like what?” I questioned softly, taking his club cut in my hands.

It kept me grounded.

He kept me grounded.

“At peace. Content.”

Not crazy, he meant.

Though, he wasn’t wrong.

I knew I could be crazy, a little bit too reckless.

But somehow, Shotgun seemed to be able to rein that in, even if only for a minute, and when he did, it was like coming home. That place where you were safe. Warm. Comfortable.

You’re getting too close.

What happens when he leaves too?

If you give him everything, you’ll have nothing left when he’s gone.

Run. Now.

And there it was—the panic setting back in.

He pressed his forehead to mine, his tongue tracing his bottom lip for a second. “Goddamn, I want to fuck you into next week.”

I swallowed the instant lump of emotion in my throat and tilted my head to the side. The words that tickled on the end of my tongue tasted fucking bitter, but I spat them out anyway, knowing they were going to poison this moment. “Well, that’s what I’m here for.”

I felt his body still, his muscles tense. He took a step back, my fingers slipping from his leathers as he backed away. I could see this hurt in his eyes, though he disguised it well.

Hurt them before they hurt you, right?

Wasn’t that the way to do it?

My head screamed yes, but my heart was crying no.

“How long are you gonna play that game, Ave?” He held his arms out wide. “You been fucking with my brothers? You taken anyone else’s cock lately but mine?”

I licked my dry lips. “I’m a club gir—”

He stormed forward, his hand at my throat, pressing me back against the desk, my naked ass sitting just on the edge. “When’s the last time anyone but me made you fucking come?” he whispered, his fingers tightening and forcing my eyes to stay on him when I tried to look away. “You wanna fuck my brothers, Avery?”

No.

This was him letting me know I wasn’t about to get away with my usual shit. This was him reminding me that pushing him was a bad fucking idea.

Yet, I didn’t know anything else. “I belong to the club,” I whispered, holding his gaze and lifting my chin. “Not you.”

He leaned in close, our lips brushing softly. “For now,” he growled under his breath before taking a step back. His hand slipped from my throat, and though he’d never squeezed tight enough to stop the airflow, I couldn’t help but suck in a deep breath.

Though maybe, it was more a relieved breath.

Relieved he’d backed down.

For now.

I didn’t know what that meant, but what I did know was that I hated the fucking look in his eyes as he backed away. It was hurt, though well-concealed. He shook his head and turned away.

“Come on,” he ordered, grabbing my shirt and bra from the floor and handing them to me. “Get dressed. I’ll take you to see Holly.”

“Thanks,” I murmured, hating the way the room had cooled around us, thinking I should have just kept my fucking mouth shut as per usual.

My gut twisted as he pulled the door open and walked out.

Leaving me there.

It was my doing.

I fucking knew it was, but it didn’t change the way it hurt. The disappointment was real, but a small price to pay for what would happen otherwise. If I gave in and let myself feel those things he made me feel, I just knew I would be risking it all.

Losing him—would break me.

Losing the club—that would destroy me.

And I knew this time, there might be no surviving.

This time, I might just lose myself too.

SHOTGUN

I pressed my hand to Avery’s back, ushering her in through the hospital doors. Despite the anger that brewed in my veins at her fucking stubbornness, I couldn’t help but fucking touch her.

She wanted to scratch me with her little claws and force me to take a step back, fine. I’d play. Let her think she had the upper hand, but I could already tell by the way she was looking at me out of the corner of her eye, she was scared this time she’d pushed me too far. Or perhaps scratched me a little too deep.

I don’t remember a time when another woman fucking compared to this pull Avery had on me. Maybe fucking never. It’d been months since any of my men had gone near her, or even fucking looked at her. It’d somehow