Avery (The Phoenix Club Girl Diaries #3) - Addison Jane Page 0,1
taste of that energy and power that radiated off him in waves.
Then maybe I could drown in something other than my own thoughts.
“I can go back in,” I offered with a shrug, taking another step toward him.
He matched it with one of his own. “Why are you crying?”
“It’s my birthday.”
“Birthday’s always make you cry?”
“Only the ones my sister was killed on.”
There it was.
The words I’d usually refuse to say out loud.
I choked out a laugh, a fresh swell of tears flooding my eyes. I let them fall. Let them streak through the light layer of makeup I’d put on today. It was a pathetic attempt to hide the dark circles under my eyes and keep anyone from realizing I was having nightmares.
That I was seeing her face in my dreams.
That I was barely sleeping.
“I’m trying to numb the pain in my chest,” I admitted, forcing my body forward on shaky legs and feigning some sort of confidence as I stepped up in front of the president of a fucking motorcycle club, about to do something I’d never fucking done before. “So you can either help, or I can go and find someone else who will.”
I was going to hell.
Booking my one-way ticket right at this moment, and I didn’t even fucking care. I’d done more than my fair share of feeding my demons. Doing whatever I had to in order to endure the pain and make it through another day.
That was what life was about, wasn’t it?
Doing things to make your heart race just so you know it’s still beating.
Sweeping my hair back from my face, I leaned in, leaving barely a breath between us and trying not to freak the hell out. My heart stopped, a soft gasp escaping when he reached up, his hand following the curve of my jaw and his fingers threading through my hair. He gave it a gentle tug, pulling my head back so I was looking up at him.
Just how he wanted it, I bet.
What the fuck are you doing, Avery?
This man could hurt you.
He could kill you.
But maybe that was the best part.
“If you’re looking for someone to sweet talk you, make you feel good, you’re looking in the wrong place,” he growled, slowly forcing me back, the glass from my smashed drink crunching underneath our shoes as he pressed me hard against the building, his lips hovering over mine, like he was waiting.
“All I’m looking for is someone to fuck me into tomorrow so I can forget about today,” I threw back, my fingers reaching for the button on his jeans. I wanted him. Bad. In more ways than I even had words for. I needed someone strong enough to lift this fucking baggage off my shoulders, even if just for a damn second and let me breathe. And he was it. It emanated from him. Like this magnetic field I couldn’t help but be sucked into.
“You think you can do that?” I murmured, my heart racing as a wave of adrenaline flooded my veins, lighting the fire that burns in the depths of my stomach. All I wanted to do was feel it, let it help me forget.
Forget about my birthday.
Forget about the hole in my heart.
Forget about never being good enough.
And most of all, forget that some bastard stole the one person who thought I was.
“You think you can make me forget my own name?”
The deep rumble of his laughter sent a tingle straight down my spine, my thighs subconsciously pressing together to try and ease the instant want.
“You wanna forget your name?” he growled, tilting my head further back and exposing my neck.
“Yes.”
“How do you feel about screaming mine?”
AVERY
Almost a Year Later
“All right, I’ll see you all next week!”
The room quickly filled with chatter and the shuffling of papers as students scurried to pack their things away and get the hell out of the lecture hall.
It was Friday, after all.
There were frat parties to attend and drinking to be done. This was the life of a college student—study during the day, drink yourself in an alcohol-induced coma at night. That was always how I imagined my college experience would be, but it wasn’t exactly where I ended up.
I pushed the door of the lecture theater open, shading my eyes from the striking sun as I stepped out into the flow of people. My skin soaked the warmth, a stark contrast to the cold, cave-like learning environments. I was certain they kept them just a touch above arctic, so