don’t even want to think about the field day the press would have if the truth of our relationship ever came out. Which is why even though Delores knows exactly what’s going on, she won’t even say the words aloud. Plausible deniability. She could always say she thought I was asking for advice on divulging a real relationship, especially given my recent history and volatile reputation.
Colt waits patiently while I find my keys, looking around the complex until I get the door unlocked. When we step inside, his forehead is furrowed like he’s confused and unhappy about something.
Which only adds to my confusion.
Slipping off my shoes, I stifle the sigh of relief at freeing my toes from their prison and set my clutch on the little table by the front door where I keep my keys. “Um …” I rub my hands up and down my arms like I’m cold, but it’s really a nervous habit. Having Colt here in my space is … strange. Exciting. Nerve wracking. He said we should hash out the details of our agreement, which is fine, but also, he sent the car away. Is he planning on staying the night?
He turns his face to me, leaving off his examination of my shoebox apartment, one eyebrow arched in invitation.
“Are you planning on sleeping here?” I blurt out, unsure how to come at the question obliquely.
His other eyebrows joins the first. “Is that an invitation?”
“What? No. I mean—should it be? I don’t know what’s going on. But you tipped the driver and sent him away. I’m confused.”
He lets out a low chuckle, stepping closer and reaching for me, but dropping his arm at the last second, his hand clenching at his side. “I figured I’d get an Uber when I’m ready to go. It’s cheaper. Plus, it sells us as a couple better if I send the car away, doesn’t it?” He spreads his hands, making his case. “If you thought I was planning on staying over, everyone else will assume the same.”
Nodding, I turn and head for the kitchen. “Right. Makes sense. I just didn’t expect that, so it threw me off. Do you want some water?” I call over my shoulder, but when I turn my head to look, he’s right there, his blue eyes sparkling in amusement.
“Water would be great.”
I take two mismatched glasses down from the cabinet—one etched with snowflakes, the other bearing the logo of a dentist office somewhere—and fill them with water. Colt seems to fill the kitchen, so I scoot back against the counter top and hand him his glass, watching him watch me over the rim as he drinks deeply.
Is he waiting for me to lead this discussion? This was all his idea after all. I don’t know what I’m doing here with him. I don’t know why I thought this was a good idea in the first place. And the more he stares at me like that, the more he kisses me like he did, the more I’m rethinking the wisdom of this. But it’s too late to back out now. If we “break up,” it’ll do more damage to my reputation, and I can’t afford that right now.
No, I’ve got to ride this thing until we reach the end of the line, whenever and wherever that may be. And I’m definitely not thinking about riding anything else. Like him. Nope. Not at all.
“Are you okay?”
The question surprises me, making me jump, but at least I manage to swallow my water without spitting it all over him. I nod like a bobble head doll. “I’m fine. Super. Totally great.” And then I give him a thumbs up. Because I’ve always been a dork and only a fine veneer of social education from my friends has kept it from coming out before. But now? Trapped in a small space with a charming, hot guy who kisses me like my mouth holds the answers to all of life’s questions?
Yeah … I can’t keep a lid on that shit anymore apparently.
His lips turn up at the corners. “You sure about that? Because you seem a little nervous.”
Setting my glass on the counter, I force myself to take a deep breath and calm down. “I am,” I admit, deciding that brutal honesty is probably the best course here. He needs to know all my idiosyncrasies if he’s going to be able to stay ahead of them in public, after all.
He nods toward the living room. “Let’s sit. And talk.”