I look up at them all then and shake my head, and Zack grits his teeth, his face darkening with a dreadful melancholy. I’m not done though, standing up and brushing the loose dirt from my dress.
“That’s what would happen in a manga, but … this isn’t a manga.” I glance back at Dad’s grave, and another surge of pain flows through me. “This is my life, and my choice is … no choice at all.”
“What the hell does that mean?” Zack whispers, his voice rough and broken. He misses Charlie, too, I know that. They were friends. Windsor and Dad, too.
“It means she doesn’t want to make a choice,” Tristan clarifies, but I shake my head, looking up to see his raven-dark hair billowing in the wind. He looks good in black, they all do. They’re all wearing their fourth year uniforms for the final time. It’s appropriate somehow, seeing the rich boys of Burberry Prep arrayed in front of me in a half-circle.
“It means I won’t make a choice,” I say, smiling through the tears and cocking my head to one side. “I don’t want to choose. I love you all. I do. And losing Charlie, it’s taught me that you don’t throw love away because of some arbitrary rules or because someone tells you to. Because the world wants you to. I love you guys, and I … I’m not ready to say goodbye to anyone else, at least not yet.”
“What you’re saying then …” Zayd starts, getting it before anybody else does. “Is that you want to keep doing what we’re doing?” I nod, and he steps forward, cupping my face in his inked hands. “Does that mean we get to go to college with you?”
“I’d hope so. It’s a little late for you to change your minds,” I start, my lip protruding as a sob wracks over me. I’m weeping now, missing Charlie like crazy as Zayd takes me in his strong arms. “The application deadline’s passed, so you’d have to take a gap year—”
“Marnye, shut up,” Zayd whispers, burying his face in my hair. He holds me tight and close until the crying passes, and then he steps back, looking me in the eyes without flinching. “Nobody tells me what to do. I make my own rules. If I want to date a girl with four other boyfriends, I will. Fuck the world. It’s none of their business anyway.”
“Thank you,” I whisper, my hands shaking.
Zack steps up next, panting heavily, tears resting on his lashes.
“Charlie …” he starts, and then he shakes his head, reaching up to scrub a hand down his face. “He raised an amazing daughter.” I keep smiling, even though everything hurts. Everything. My heart, my soul. “I’m in. I … don’t want to know what college is like without you.”
“You know I’m here for you,” Windsor says, voice soft and low. “Always.” The wind tousles his hair, and he smiles. “Maybe one day, you’ll really marry me. You can even keep these assholes around. I don’t care.”
“I knew it when we kissed on the boat that night, in the cold,” Creed interjects, stepping forward. “You’re my soulmate, Marnye. I’m sure of it.”
“Told you!” Miranda calls from somewhere nearby, pulling a small, sad laugh from me. “#TeamCreed!”
I pause then, and notice Tristan’s eyes are closed.
When he opens them, he looks up at the sky.
“If you’re worried about your tuition, I’ll pay it,” Windsor says, and Tristan drops his gaze to the prince, smirking.
“I got a full-ride scholarship, you pompous ass. Guess next year, I’ll be the freshman charity case at a new school, won’t I?”
“Hopefully the students don’t try to bully you,” I whisper as Tristan turns to look at me.
“God help them if they do,” he says, and I know he means that. There’s a long stretch of silence as he studies me. That’s when I know it for sure: he’s going to say no. Tristan is going to say no, and he’s going to walk away, and that’ll be the end of all this.
Not every story wraps up in a beautiful package at the end, huh?
My time at Burberry Preparatory Academy is over, and with it, ends this chapter of my life. Marnye Reed, scholarship student, daughter of Charlie and Jennifer, honor roll enthusiast, lover of old architecture and boring historical facts.