Arcadia's Gift - By Jesi Lea Ryan Page 0,40

went to a farm for a field trip in fourth grade, and Shawn literally squealed when a cow walked up behind him,” she explained.

“It had this evil look in its eye,” Shawn claimed. “I think it had mad cow disease or rabies or something.”

“Oh, the Mad Rabid Cow of Iowa!” I exclaimed laughing. “Stop talking about it, or you’ll scare Bryan away.” It had been so long since I really laughed, and it felt wonderful.

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed someone looking in my direction. Cane Matthews stood a few tables over holding his tray of food in one hand and a bottle of Vitamin water in the other. His glare turned my blood to ice water, halting my giggles instantly.

Shawn followed my gaze. “What’s his problem?” he asked.

I shrugged and stared down at the table.

Bryan’s gaze narrowed in on Cane, and he leaned a little bit closer to me.

“It must be hard on him to see Cady,” Bronwyn answered. “She’s like a living reminder of Lony.”

“So? It’s not like she can help it,” Shawn stuck up for me.

I hadn’t really thought about how it must be for Cane to face me, the mirror image of his dead girlfriend. A shiver rolled down my spine. I wondered how he was holding up. Even though I always sort of thought of him as a meat-head, he always treated my sister well. He also had been the person standing closest to Lony when the train struck, which meant he’d had a front row view of the carnage, something I missed out on witnessing by passing out. Part of me wanted to go talk to him, to comfort him in some way, but I knew it would probably just make things worse.

After lunch, Bryan and I walked together to class.

“I like your friends,” he commented. “They’re cool.”

“Thanks.”

“So are Shawn and Bronwyn like…together?” he asked.

I couldn’t help but chuckle. “No. Shawn…well…let’s just say you’re more his type than we are.”

“Oh…I get it.”

I glanced over to see his expression. If Bryan turned out to be some sort of homophobe, I might have to give this friendship another thought.

He just winked at me. “Shawn’s cute and all, but I’m afraid my interests lean in another direction.”

I blushed and then scolded myself. He was not flirting with you! He was just letting you know he’s straight.

In lit class, the whirlwind of emotions crept up again, but Bryan’s presence behind me helped me to keep them at bay. Focusing my mind on him distracted me from the other feelings. I even raised my hand to answer for the first time all day. But when lit was over, and I went to French class, I felt like a ship lost at sea.

I struggled to concentrate. Along with the variety of emotions I’d been experiencing all day, there was something darker coming over me, a deep black cloud of depression, different from what I’d been feeling at home. The classroom was set up with the desks in a circle to promote conversation. I peered around at the other students to see if they felt anything amiss. Some seemed tired, a few bored, and one guy bobbed his head up and down slightly to the beat of the ear buds under the hood of his sweatshirt. Around me, the flowery language filled the air like the scent of perfume at a funeral.

Chapter 16

When the final bell rang, signaling my release from school, I ran out the double-doors as fast as I could, my head spinning from the storm of emotions. The air was warm for late September, and my feet crunched the red and gold leaves under my feet. I didn’t want to go home. Not yet. After the day I had, the last thing I wanted to do was return to the House of Perpetual Mourning. Rather than turning down my street, my feet trekked on aimlessly.

What in the heck happened to me today? It was something more than just sadness over my sister and the uneasiness of returning to school. It was like I’d been put in a clothes dryer filled with all of the emotions of everyone in the school and forced to tumble around with them for seven hours. I was worn out.

I turned down the next street over from my house. There was a small park a couple of blocks down where Bronwyn and I sometimes liked to hang out on the swings. A broken piece of sidewalk chalk was left abandoned on