Anything but Minor - Kate Stewart Page 0,79

as he pumped frantically. “We won’t.”

Heavy, that’s the only way to describe the feeling throughout my body as I made my way past the game day flags and toward the entrance where I spotted Dutch. Her eyes scanned the crowd with hope until they landed on me. Her lips turned upward into a soft smile as I read her posture. She was sure I wouldn’t show.

Andy was the reason I was there. Throughout the day, I couldn’t imagine walking up the steps into the stadium without seeing the pitcher with the sharp eyes that I was madly in love with taking the field.

For Andy. This is for Andy.

The day after Rafe left, Andy had gone to the team manager, Jon, and asked for release from his contract. We were all surprised when he’d decided to end his last season early, and even more so when he’d mentioned they’d granted his request. We knew Andy was intent on quitting ball and dedicated to Rafe’s promotion, but it wasn’t until then that we knew just how much. Andy had surprised us all with his determination to end his career on his terms, in his time. What was even more surprising was that he could have easily been asked to the show with his record breaking stats this season. Rafe was still fuming over his decision and had told me as much in our last conversation.

The burn in my chest intensified as Dutch greeted me with a nod, and I lifted each foot with dread. Rafe was gone and would miss his best friend’s last game. I let a tear trail down my face as I thought of everything that happened since I saw the flyer and trusted it to lead me where I needed to go.

My heartbreak cursed the damned insanity of needing to belong that day because I was searching for something...someone to belong to...and I’d found it with Rafe.

“He’s going to hate not being here,” Dutch remarked as we took our seats.

I nodded, unable to mask the pain that festered inside me, threatening to rear its ugly head at any moment. It had only been weeks and I felt like the only life I’d ever wanted had been taken away.

“Do you want a beer?” Dutch offered as I looked over at her.

I stood, looking for any excuse to keep from roaming the field and coming up empty. “I’ll go.”

“Stay where you are, missy,” she ordered. “I can handle it.”

“I’m sorry I’ll be such poor company. Let me treat.” I handed Dutch a twenty as I resumed my seat. She looked down at me with a sad twist of her lips and gentle eyes.

“I saw it, you know. I saw it the minute you two looked at each other. It was something to see. I don’t think you’re alone in feeling the way you are right now.”

I wiped a lone tear from underneath my eye and nodded with a forced smile. “Thank you...f-for saying that. Go get that beer and let’s toast to Andy.”

“Coming up, missy,” she said as she pinched the bridge of my ball cap and jiggled it a bit.

“Dutch?”

“Yeah,” she replied quickly, her eyes covered in concern. I could feel her need to console me, and I hated that I was making a game that hadn’t even begun so damned depressing.

“Thank you for this. Thank you for letting me sit in Herb’s chair.”

Dutch simply nodded before she moved to climb the few steps to reach the walkway that led to the concession stands.

“Ladddies and gentlemen, please rise for our national anthem!”

I stood with my hand over my disintegrated heart and glanced at my phone before I tucked it away in my pocket. I hadn’t heard a word from him today. I knew he was busy getting acclimated with his surroundings and his new team, but I felt so disconnected from him already, so uncertain about our future. His words ran on repeat in my head.

“No end, Alice. No end.”

I nodded as if he’d just whispered it to me. I was losing it, and I was doing it with an audience. Everyone around me glanced my way from time to time, no longer strangers but my true community. I looked to my right at the family man, who had attended nearly as many games as I had. He looked on at me with sympathy as his blond baby slept in his lap. He winked in reassurance, and I nodded with a disgraceful smile.

I heard the announcer start to tick