Another Life Altogether: A Novel - By Elaine Beale Page 0,144

was also why I didn’t hear the front door open, the footsteps on the stairs and along the hallway, and probably why I didn’t hear someone turn the knob on the door of my room.

“Modern Homosexuality, eh? I tell you, times have certainly changed since I was a lad.”

I looked up to see Frank standing in the open doorway. “It’s for homework,” I blurted, dropping the book into my lap.

“That right?” he asked, a grin blooming across his bony face.

“Yes.” My voice sounded far away. My heart was hammering in my chest.

“So you’re not one of them queers, then?”

I shook my head. This time, I found I couldn’t even speak.

“Good job, that. Because, you know, there really is nothing more terrible for a parent to find out than their kid’s a pervert. If I ever found out either of my little ones was queer—well, I think I’d rather kill ’em. I know it sounds harsh, but really, it’s a parent’s worst nightmare, that is. And your mam, her being so fragile, I can’t imagine she’d take news like that very well at all.”

I tried to meet his eyes, but I couldn’t. Instead, I looked down at the dense text in the pages of the book.

“So,” Frank said, “you seen your uncle Ted? I came up here looking for him. He’s supposed to be out job hunting with me.”

“He’s sleeping,” I said.

Frank laughed. “Should do well on the night shift, Ted, don’t you think? I mean, he certainly has no trouble sleeping during the day.”

“You’re not helping him get a job, are you?” I had closed the book and pushed it away from me, to the far side of my bed. Somehow, distancing myself from it like that gave me courage and allowed the anger I felt at Frank to flare alive. “You’re doing something else. Something you shouldn’t. Something Mabel wouldn’t like.”

Frank’s features became stiff. He took a couple more steps into my room. “It’s none of your bloody business what Ted and me are doing, you hear me? None of your business at all. And if you say one word to upset Mabel, one bloody word, I’ll make you sorry.” He let his eyes flicker down to my feet and then he slid them slowly over my body until they finally rested on my face. “More sorry than you have ever been. Understand me?”

“Yes,” I replied quietly.

“Good. Glad to hear it. Now, why don’t you get back to your reading? You looked real wrapped up in it before I disturbed you.” He nodded at the book. “A shame you’ve gone and lost your place.”

As soon as I heard Frank and Ted leave the house and drive toward the road, I dived into my wardrobe and retrieved the biscuit tin I’d hidden there. Again, I considered burning the letters, but again I just couldn’t bring myself to destroy them. I also knew that I couldn’t keep them there at the bottom of my wardrobe any longer. Frank was an ever more frequent visitor now. If he wandered into my bedroom when I wasn’t there, I wouldn’t put it past him to rifle through my things. I didn’t want him to find the whiskey or the pills that I’d put in my laundry basket, of course, but if he did I could live with the consequences of that. What I wouldn’t be able to live through, however, was his reading my letters. I had to prevent that happening at all costs. So I went downstairs and retrieved a large brown paper bag from the kitchen and placed all of my letters inside. Then I stuffed the bag into my school satchel, determined that, from now on, I would keep it with me at all times.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

I RETURNED MODERN HOMOSEXUALITY TO THE LIBRARIAN’S SLUSH PILE the following week, which was the week of Mabel and Frank’s wedding. The ceremony, to be held that Saturday afternoon, was supposed to have been led by the vicar of Midham, but two weeks earlier someone had broken into the Midham church, made off with the silver collection plate and the candlesticks, and vandalized the altar by spray-painting STATUS QUO FOREVER! on the church’s massive oak table. The vicar, no more knowledgeable about popular heavy-metal bands now than he had been after the Black Sabbath fan defaced his church, apparently thought this was some sort of political statement and stormed into the monthly meeting of the local Young Conservatives Club to make several ugly accusations about its