justice are handled by the elder council. It is our way. They know my feelings and desires about the trial. I have made that abundantly clear.”
“And what do you want to happen?” she couldn’t help but ask.
“He is my brother,” he told her softly, spearing her with a look that almost made her gasp…because he looked so much like Jaxor in that moment. “Of course I want him pardoned.”
“Even after everything he’s done? To you?” she tested.
He let out a short exhale. “You know Jaxor as well as I. You know his motivations. I told him I have forgiven him for his actions because I understood them, but I fear that he will never be able to extend that same forgiveness to himself.”
Erin stilled.
“He wanted revenge on the male who killed our mother. Our sire. So many Luxirians. He wanted to help the females that survived. Those motivations are just…but what he is truly on trial for are two things. Endangering you and Crystal—”
“But he—”
“And knowing that Jetutians were entering our atmosphere undetected,” Vaxa’an continued. “The council would have been likely to pardon him for this second offense, given that his aid led to the vaccine. But the first…”
“Because of Crystal and me?” she said, shocked. She shook her head. “That’s ridiculous. He didn’t hurt us.”
Well…at least not physically, she amended silently, thinking about the constant ache in her chest.
“The council sees it another way. Crimes against females are not taken likely.”
“Can I talk to them?” Erin asked, her eyes pleading up at Vaxa’an. “And I know that Crystal will offer the same. I mean, because of Jaxor, she has Cruxan now. She doesn’t have any lingering feelings about it. Besides, how is it any different than what Vikan or Kirov did? They both took Taylor and Lainey from the Golden City without your knowledge! But are they on trial for it?”
She didn’t mean to throw her friends’ mates under the bus, but she was trying to make a point.
Vaxa’an’s lips pressed together. “I never said the trial was fair.”
A drop of sweat ran down her back. There was a long stretch of silence between them.
“Kat told me you don’t plan to leave on the vessel for Earth,” Vaxa’an broached quietly.
Erin’s brow furrowed, confused why he was bringing that up now. “No, I don’t.”
“Because you love my brother and you wish to stay here with him?” Vaxa’an asked. Erin looked down at the terrace, at the feather-light slippers protecting her feet from the heated stones. “I must warn you, female, that you might not like the council’s decision. There might not be a life for him here.”
He was telling her to leave? Go back to Earth? Abandon Jaxor?
Erin felt anger rise up in her and it felt good. It felt…surprising.
“I’m pregnant,” she told him, peering up at him.
His brows rose. So, Kate hadn’t told him. Or perhaps Crystal and Lainey hadn’t told anyone after their conversation a couple days ago.
“He doesn’t know,” Erin said, seeing the question form in his mind. “Not yet. I—I haven’t told him.”
Erin had to give Vaxa’an credit. He took things in stride, but she supposed a Prime Leader would have to.
“Then do not fear, female, for your future here,” he said, inclining his head. “Your child will be of the royal bloodline and because of that, you will have—”
“I don’t care about bloodlines,” she said softly, frowning. “And I’m not angling for a secure future because I’m pregnant with your brother’s child.”
“My apologies, I did not mean to imply that. I am just…surprised by the news.”
“I know,” Erin said, feeling a little of her temper melt away. “It’s just…I’m scared. For Jaxor. For the baby. For this damn trial. He might’ve hurt me and lied to me, but that doesn’t mean that I want him…gone.”
Just the thought made her throat close.
“It doesn’t mean…there’s not a future for us,” she whispered, her vision blurring with tears. More tears. She’d never cried this much in her entire life. At least now she could blame it on hormones.
She allowed herself a small cry, all too aware that Vaxa’an was standing helplessly by, probably wishing that Kate was out here to console her. Luxirians weren’t exactly masters of showing emotions and it seemed to make them uncomfortable when others did.
Pull yourself together, she told herself. And slowly, she did, blinking back tears, wiping her face dry.
She turned her gaze towards the Black Desert, remembering when Jaxor had taken her and Crystal across it in his sandcraft. It seemed so