cried out and moaned and smiled as she said it a short while ago. Remembering brought back that familiar, dull ache, but mostly, she felt a little numb thinking about it, thinking about him.
“When he first came here, I believe he was,” Kossira said. “Pivar was leader of the Mevirax then. He believed that Jaxor came to spy on us. It took time for Jaxor to prove that he would be loyal to the ways of the Mevirax.”
“How long?” Erin whispered, fearing she knew. “How long was he kept down here?”
Kossira shrugged, though her lips pressed together. “A rotation. From what I have heard.”
The breath was squeezed from her lungs and her fingers dug into the dirt of the floor. Earth that Jaxor would have laid upon, in darkness.
A year.
No wonder…she thought.
She closed her eyes, feeling pain pour into her belly, making her want to vomit. She’d talked to him of her fear of sharks and he’d told her he was afraid of the dark. How silly, how small her fear must’ve seemed to him when faced with the reality of this. This endless dark. Now she understood why he always kept a lantern lit where they slept. She felt even more like a fool now.
“Tavar saw Jaxor as a weapon. A useful one. After Tavar took rule from his brother, he released Jaxor from the dungeons, brought him up to the surface to live among us.”
So, of course, Jaxor would be loyal to Tavar. He’d saved him from this darkness, this loneliness, this madness. Otherwise, he could’ve rotted alone down here.
Erin felt that loneliness creeping, like little fingers trailing along the ground towards her. How had Jaxor withstood it? Especially since he’d just lost his family back then?
Because mentally, he was strong, she decided. Erin believed he could probably withstand anything.
Yet, he’d also confessed to her about his loneliness, living at his base. And right then, Erin wanted to curse him for making her begin to love him, while also wanting him so much that she ached with it.
“Do you love Tavar?” Erin whispered to Kossira.
The female went still. “Of course I do.”
Erin watched as her hand went to her lower belly, cupping the swell almost protectively. She’d learned a little about Kossira over the course of the last five days and nights. Every time she came, she answered a couple of Erin’s questions, but ignored others.
She’d learned that Kossira had been born in the Caves of the Pevrallix, just like Tavar. That her father had been one of Tavar’s father’s allies in the rebellion at the Golden City. Their families were closely linked. Kossira had always known she would be the chosen mate—or rather, breeding partner—for one of the sons. She’d told Erin it was an honor, but her eyes had seemed hollow as she said it.
Erin wanted to hate her. But she couldn’t. Kossira had been somewhat kind to her—disregarding the whole imprisonment situation. She’d made sure she was well-fed, though sometimes Erin had a difficult time holding down the food, and Kossira always sat with her as she ate…talked to her.
“What…” Kossira trailed off, frowning, then looked down at her belly, thinking over something.
She’d been about to ask Erin something, which she’d never done before. Erin had always asked the questions.
“Yes?” Erin prompted quietly, dragging the tray over to herself, reaching out to eat some more dried meat, which tasted like ash on her tongue, as though it would make Kossira ask her question.
“What is the Golden City like?” Kossira asked softly, not meeting her eyes. It wasn’t quite a whisper, but with the guard looming near the stairs, she still felt the need to lower her voice. Why? Were they not allowed to talk about the Golden City?
Erin licked her dry lips, taking a swig of the water. Her heartbeat had raced a bit at Kossira’s question. A tiny bloom of hope swelled in her heart. Would Kossira help her?
“I didn’t see much of it while I was there,” Erin answered truthfully. “But what I did see was beautiful. Otherworldly, like something out of a book.”
Kossira frowned.
Erin realized belatedly that they probably didn’t have books and even if they did, it was a human projection to assume those books held fantastical stories within them.
Quickly, she continued, “It’s a city carved out from the side of a tall mountain. With views of a black sand desert that stretches on for miles. And the sun is so bright there that everything seems warm and golden…hence the name,