The Ahern Brothers Collection - Claudia Burgoa Page 0,124
me.”
I chuckle. “It’s when you’re crumbling to your very core that you see people for who they really are. The only person who gave a shit was my little brother. Sterling kicked me out of my own company. I was a fucking mess. We don’t discuss you because he thinks I might fall off the wagon. It took me a long time to get my shit together and even longer to get over you.”
“Wes,” she mumbles, her eyes connecting with mine.
“I missed you every night,” I continue before I lose the courage. “Some days though, I couldn’t sleep for thinking about you while others I woke up because of a nightmare. I tossed and turned in bed, picking up the phone and dialing your number just to listen to your voicemail. I prayed that you were doing alright. That there was someone by your side consoling you while you were having nightmares.
“The regret and guilt ate me alive for a long time. I wished I hadn’t let you go so easily. I held onto you for a long time. Sometimes I wondered if getting in touch would be wise while others I just hoped you had found someone.”
My heart stutters as I confess what I lived through while we were apart. There’s this falling-spiraling-down-losing-control feeling flowing through my veins. I don’t let it stop me though.
“I missed you with every fiber of my being. There’s a part of my heart that’s incomplete. You have it. I pretended we were together for such a long time until I moved on because we both deserve so much more than being stuck in the past.”
Taking a full sip of air to fill my lungs, I finish. “I stopped chasing the past, and your ghost.”
“Okay.” She says when I pause.
“Now that I found you, I don’t want to lose you.” I pray that she doesn’t misunderstand the purpose of this long speech. “In fact, I’m hoping that we can go forward, together.”
“Forward?”
“I want to get to know the person you became. I don’t care about your hands, if you have nightmares, or if you need to count to a billion to take your next breath. Because I’ll happily count with you every single night if you’re by my side.”
“There’s a lot more to it than that, Wes.” Her voice is flat, monotone. Her chin trembles. “You just told me that you don’t live here. You have a life; you’ve found your passion. My journey just started. We’re definitely not the same people anymore, and we’re in different dimensions.”
A wave of pain suffuses my senses, but I shake it off and take a good look at my Abby. She’s trembling, holding her breath, waiting. I bet she wants me to give up. It’s going to take a long time to show her that I didn’t give up on her, but I wasn’t strong enough to be her rock. She may have changed, but her soul remains the same. The essence of the Abby I fell in love with remains intact. Although, I can’t wait to discover her new dreams.
“Well, tell me everything. That’s what I’m here for,” I request eagerly. “I can’t wait to get to know you because as I once said: we belong together.”
She offers a fake smile while shaking her head. As if saying, poor man, he couldn’t be more wrong. Abby unbuttons her shirt to open it, as I stare into her beautiful brown eyes. I see her soul shuddering. I want to grab her and cocoon her in my arms until she calms down.
Instead, I move my gaze to her torso. There are thin lines across her skin. Marks that gather along her ribs and her stomach. Too many scars; too much pain. I kiss my finger and trace them.
“He did this?” I say, controlling my voice and my emotions.
I knew he had cut her. The doctor said, multiple cuts in the torso. I just never saw them until today. My heart aches more and more as I trace each line. How I wish I had held her when she was in the hospital. I just thought that I didn’t deserve to be close to her after I’d failed her.
“Yeah, that night,” she says with a dry sob. Abby breathes heavily, her hands in two angry fists.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper. “You have no idea how sorry I am that I couldn’t get to you in time. That I allowed him to touch you again. It wasn’t my fault but still.