Aetherbound - E.K. Johnston Page 0,5

her last infraction. She didn’t like the small space or the confining dark, but she was coming to appreciate the solitude. She’d been forced to eat the matter as part of her own rations, of course, so there hadn’t been any waste, but such behaviour couldn’t go unpunished. “You have to be more careful.”

Pendt held her chin up and took it like a Harland.

Three days and two more stints in the cupboard after that, she overheard her cousins discussing if their mother was going to airlock her.

“It would be much more economical,” Donalin argued. “Otherwise we’re going to feed her all these years to bring us dinner. Usually, we make people pay us to do that, just for the privilege of being on our ship.”

“She’s still Family,” Tanith said. She was sixteen, and there was something in her face that made Pendt think she knew a secret that would never even occur to her younger sister or any of the boys. “A Harland is always worth something, even if we have to wait for her for a bit.”

“The captain has made it clear we’re not to bother with her one way or the other,” Jerrus said. He was the most practical of the lot, the most like his mother, except he couldn’t feel the stars. “So, we won’t, unless we get new orders.”

“And you’d better set an example for her sibs,” Tanith said. “Not to mention Karderee. They need to understand how fragile our balance is, and what Pendt’s flaws might cost us.”

That shut everyone up for a while. The Harlands were not afraid of space, but they were respectful towards it, and not a one of them, Pendt included, was going to tempt fate.

As she cleared plates from the table without being acknowledged by any of her relatives, it occurred to Pendt that she had one thing they didn’t have: She had seen the stars.

She didn’t see them again for a very long time.

3.

JUST BEFORE SHE TURNED eight, Pendt asked if she could work in hydroponics. She told her mother that she knew as much about plants as she did about protein—which was to say, not much—and that she thought she could help the plants grow better.

“How do you know that?” Lodia asked, and Pendt found herself the sole recipient of her mother’s attention quite suddenly. It was not a reassuring feeling.

“I just”—Pendt groped for words to explain the feeling—“I just do?”

It was difficult to elucidate. It was similar to the feeling that Pendt had as she measured out calories onto her siblings’ plates, but wilder and less predictable. She felt it most strongly when she had just eaten, and sometimes it knocked the wind out of her if she chased it for too long.

Lodia was quiet for a moment, and then she put her hands under Pendt’s chin and forced her to make eye contact.

“You will always feel that call,” Lodia said. Her voice was pure Officer, but there was a fear in her eyes that Pendt didn’t understand. “I feel a call to the stars and your brothers feel the call of electricity, but you must never answer it, do you understand me?”

“But I can make the plants grow better,” Pendt protested. “I know I can. I can be better for the Harland.”

“The Harland has all the plants it needs,” Lodia said. “The machines in hydroponics are sufficient to our needs, and they do not require calories like you would if you did their work.”

Tears sprang to Pendt’s eyes. She hadn’t learned to control the impulse to cry yet, even though she was always determined to stop herself. She ground them off her cheeks with the palms of her hand and faced her mother.

“I want to be better for the Harland, sir,” she said. “I’m sorry my idea is a bad one.”

“It’s all right, Pendt,” Lodia said. “If you knew everything about ship operations at eight, it would be a miracle. It takes a long time to understand the balance of space. Your aunt works hard to maintain it, making sure we have exactly what we need and nothing more. That’s how we survive.”

Her mother opened the door to their quarters and ushered Pendt out into the hallway. It was past time for both of their shifts to start. Lodia was nearly due on the bridge to relieve the captain for the afternoon’s inspection, and Pendt was, as always, to report to the galley.

“Will you leave me at the next colony?” Pendt asked just before her mother