Addicted to You - Suzanne Jenkins Page 0,3
Jake was madly in love with you. Passionately. I love Wendy, don’t get me wrong. But when we’re together, I’m not sure the whole room knows. When you and Jake were together, everyone knew he loved you. It made the elders nervous, like he was going to throw you down and commit acts of perversion at Sunday dinner.”
“You’re nuts,” she said, laughing out loud.
“Seriously, Sofia, Jake loved you. You were together because you loved each other. It doesn’t have to be more complicated than that. If anyone has made you question his love for you, don’t allow that person into your life.”
“Okay. I’m sorry I’m so morose. I keep trying to justify why we were together and then why this happened. But what difference does it make? He’s dead. I won’t waste any more time wondering why we were together.”
“It’s the great enigma. You’ve definitely been through enough for a while.”
“I’m sorry I’m whining.”
“You were always a whiner. Now you have something to whine about.”
Fake-swatting at him, the moment passed. They teased each other for a while, ordering another beer.
“So what’s next for you? I hear that you’re living life like you’re in a convent.”
“Oh god, it’s not that bad,” she said, laughing again. At least her cousin made her laugh. “I just work and putter around my house. This is nice, what we’re doing here. I might have to start going out with friends again. I just haven’t felt up to it, to tell you the truth.”
“His death really took the air out of everyone’s balloons,” Oliver empathized.
“How’s married life?” she asked, wanting to change the subject.
He’d recently married a nurse he met after he got injured in a football game.
“It’s nice. We do our own thing for work, and then we come together when we’re home. I’m sorry you didn’t get to do that with Jake. But I feel like he wants you to move on, Sofia. He’d probably be upset that you’re not moving forward.”
“Like you said, it hasn’t even been a year yet. I’m not sure I want to go too far forward,” she whispered.
“Well, if the opportunity comes up, don’t let it pass you by, okay?”
Nodding in agreement, Sofia felt better than she had in months, as Jake’s spirit seemed to hover over them, pleased.
“Thank you so much, Oliver. If something happens, I won’t let it get away.”
They grasped hands as she made him the promise.
“I guess I’d better get back to work,” Sofia finally said, breaking the spell. “I’m doing a story about a guy in Escondido who rescues squirrels.”
“Get out of here, then,” Oliver said, laughing.
They walked out to the street together, promising to do it again soon, hugging warmly. She waved, walking back to her car, smiling. But when the weekend came again, and her friends who persistently asked her to come out with them called, she declined.
Chapter 1
At lunchtime, Sofia sat at a red light, waiting to make a left-hand turn into the shopping center. The car window was down and she could hear the surf in spite of the traffic noise. There was a storm out to sea, and the marine layer was quickly burning off, the hot sun trying to peek through the fog. A recurrent memory zipped through her mind, of Jake moaning with impatience, waiting for the haze to dissipate so he could surf.
While she waited, the memory dispelled when a guy with an empty Starbucks cup caught her eye, panhandling on the median, approaching cars, holding his cup out. Certain things about him were definitely noticeable; from the back, he was tall, well built, and from a distance seemed to be clean and clean-cut. Homeless people set her teeth on edge, and she decided that when she was finished, she’d take a different way out so she didn’t have to encounter him. She kept her eyes straight ahead after the light turned green so she didn’t have to make eye contact.
The one hour she allowed herself for lunch meant grabbing something fast when she didn’t bring anything from home. The cupboards were bare until she shopped after work that night, her normal routine. Friday nights meant grocery shopping, house cleaning, and TV. Yippee.
“No wonder I’m alone,” she murmured, pulling into Poki Poki, a relatively healthy fast place to eat.
She ordered her usual, a regular poki bowl with brown rice, tuna, avocado, cucumbers, seaweed and scallions.
“I’ll take a Diet Coke, too,” she said, a guilty pleasure.
There weren’t many diners yet, so she had a choice of tables,