86'd: A Novel - By Dan Fante Page 0,45
room and closed the door behind me, then turned off the Dodgers game.
“Look,” Marty said, getting to his feet, “I just want to know: Am I fired or not? I need this job. Just tell me if I’m bumped. Yes or no.”
“What happened?” I asked. “I know nothing about this. I just got here. I’ve been chasing fish in a swimming pool all morning.”
“Okay, right. Look, you know that we started driving Jennifer Lopiss, right?”
“Right,” I said. “We got the account from her management company. Damn decent new clients according to Koffman. We drive them in New York.”
“Well, last night after a party in Hollywood, like around two a.m., I was taking Lopiss back to her place above Sunset and she’s in the back of the car talking on her cell most of the ride. Just this and that kinda stuff, but you could tell she was pissed-off at someone. Her manager or an agent or somebody.”
“Okay.”
“So, I didn’t realize that she ended the call. I was doing something else. You know, checking her street address on the GPS. Something. But then she starts yelling at me. “Hey, jerkoff! Whaz your problem? I’m talkin’ to you! Hey, moron, don’t fuckin’ ignore me!’”
“So I look in my rearview mirror and now she’s right behind me on the jump seat. She’s kicking the console with the heels of her pointy boots. Screaming. Going nuts, you know. I mean I’m thinking maybe she’s on dust or speed or something, but I can see she’s doing some real damage to the car.”
“Okay. So what happened?”
“We were on La Cienega. I put the flashers on and pulled over and got out. I walked around to the passenger side and opened the back door. ‘Look,’ I say. ‘I’m sorry I didn’t hear you. I thought you were talking on your cell. I’m very sorry. But you’ve got to stop kicking the car.’”
“I’d have done the same thing,” I said. “You can’t put up with that stuff. It doesn’t matter who she is.”
“But now she’s completely out of control, calling me bitch and cocksucker and faggot and screaming and all.”
“So…?”
“So I pulled her by the arm out of the car. Then I handed her her purse. I couldn’t think of anything else to do. I left her on the sidewalk and drove off. Right there.”
Marty’s account sounded true and I knew him as a decent guy. Reliable, presentable, and always on time. I was sure that the story had already gotten back to David Koffman and that there would be major problems. “Well,” I said, “as far as I’m concerned you’re clean. You were looking out for company property.”
“But when I come in this morning for my airport run Rosie’s frantic ’n’ all. She got calls from Lopiss’s manager and two different attorneys. Rosie says they’re going to press charges for assault and sue the company for this and that.”
“Spoiled-brat central, pal,” I said. “Welcome to the exciting and glamorous limo business.”
“Look, man, I didn’t hurt the woman. I was trying to do the right thing is all. I just want to know: Will I get fired for what happened? Is my job at risk here?”
“No,” I said, “you’re not fired from this company. Of course I’ll go over the details but if everything you just said is on the money, you and I have no problem. That’s a promise.”
“What about David Koffman? He gets upset. I’ve seen it. He’s pretty picky.”
“I’ll handle David.”
“You mean we’re cool?”
“Just keep doing your job and I’ll straighten this out with Koffman and our attorney and whoever else is hunting your scalp.”
“Thanks, Bruno. I mean really, thank you.”
“You’re a good chauffeur, Marty. Go in and tell Rosie to put you back on the schedule. Tell her I said it’s okay.”
twenty-one
By Friday that week the Malibu shoot with Stedman was over. The director of It Creeps, Mel Kleinman, had been sacked and I was hoping for a week layoff between locations. That, apparently, was not to be. My Monday morning dispatch instructions were to pick up Ronny at his production office at 9200 Sunset.
I was parked at a meter outside the building when my cell phone rang. It was Ronny’s new secretary Brandi telling me that Mr. Stedman wanted me to come up to the eleventh floor.
When I got off the elevator and walked into the lobby of Hollywood Star Productions, sexy no-bra Brandi asked me to have a seat, then went into Ronny’s office to report my arrival.
I was sure that