Zenith in Love (Zenith Series #5) - Leanne Davis Page 0,38

A simple conversation would solve it, but Jim was not simple. Complicated. Strange. Odd. And really smokin’ hot.

And he was here. Kayla was ready to take whatever she could get now. Never mind all the whys and wherefores, at least for now. Of course. Jim had trust issues and maybe this wasn’t what he wanted, but she knew he did want it, hence his being here. So with more time, would there be more trust? What about more sex? She could only wonder.

But oh. She got a thrill at Jim’s soft, deep words, It’s you.

She was in big trouble.

“When I asked you not to come to church, it wasn’t because I didn’t want to see you anymore. I just don’t know how to do this. How to be one way with you and another way as pastor. If I see you sitting there for my sermon, speaking will be pretty much impossible for me.”

“I won’t show up then. We’ll keep it super hush-hush. Just between us.”

“Can we just not discuss it all the time?”

She smiled. Ah. A booty call without strings. If any other man said that to her, she’d scoff and call him an ass. If a girlfriend experienced it, she’d tell her to get her head out of her ass and realize the guy wasn’t into her, he just wanted sex. That’s it. But with Jim?

Oh, damn no. She knew he was not doing that. He was struggling with his spirituality and mortality. Fighting for his soul or something. She didn’t get it at all. But whatever happened to Jim, he definitely had lots of sex at some point. He stopped for a while and now that he started doing it again, she doubted he could stop. His body, brain, emotions and heart rediscovered how good sex feels and that’s what horrified him. It seemed to scare him. But he didn’t want to hurt her. Kayla believed that. He would never use her.

“We can do it like this for awhile. I’ll tell you when it’s not enough for me.”

“This? How this happened…”

Flipping over, she rose above him and stared down at his face. Her gaze scoured his features. Jim had an interesting, complex face. Even wearing glasses. She took them from him and smiled, saying, “These must have steamed up pretty foggy at some point.”

Jim smiled and his weariness and confusion retreated for a moment. “I remove them when…” His gaze darted around as if he were searching for a word that he feared saying out loud, “Necessary.”

She smiled sweetly. Holding his face, she said, “Get this through your head: if, for a split second, I did not like what you or we were doing together, you would be the first to know. I would yell, kick, sing or do whatever, but you would know. Okay? And you can regret other things you miss or get wrong, mostly conversational issues, but don’t put a damper on the consensual, hot sex. Okay?”

He swallowed and nodded. She smiled. “See? That wasn’t so hard.”

“Everything feels… hard.”

Oh, he teed them up to perfection for her. She bit her lip and tried to hide her blossoming smirk. Jim was quite serious; she could see it in his eyes and the dour set of his mouth. But she also perceived the sexual innuendo.

Kissing him sweetly, she replied, “I know.”

“I should go.”

She didn’t want him to leave. But knowing Rob and her mother could be anywhere in the house, and Eric was definitely there, who knew about Kathy or Karlee? Kayla shut her eyes and dropped her forehead on his. “Yes. God.” She lifted her gaze and winced. “Does my use of the word God offend you? I said it as a… I don’t know… just a personal expression. I don’t mean anything irreverent by it. It’s just… something I’ve always said.”

“No. Most people do. Even Christians.”

“What about pastors?” She grinned, lifting her face up to tease him. She stunned herself by realizing she was sexing up a pastor. Not a reality she ever imagined herself doing.

“No. I don’t use the Lord’s name unless I am addressing him.”

She nodded and kissed him, saying simply, “Okay. I’ll try not to so often. It might slip out occasionally, but I’ll sure try to refrain from it.”

“You don’t have to.”

She sighed as she started to sit up. “Oh, Pastor Jim, I think it’s the least I can do. I might have corrupted you. Have I deflowered your moral fiber? Led you away from the eternal light? Broken your