“No doubt. It’s an amazing achievement. But that’s not what I meant. Are you going to tell them you don’t want it?”
She sat up straight and narrowed her eyes on me. “What makes you think I don’t want it? I busted my fucking ass for that.”
I didn’t say anything. I just watched her steadily. That was a knee-jerk reaction—the response she’d conditioned herself to have. But we both knew what she’d said to me in that dark little room, and I’d seen that panicked look in her eyes in the auditorium.
After a few moments, she got to her feet. Her eyes darted from left to right, distant and unseeing, as she chewed on her bottom lip.
“Your friends and family love you and support you,” I said. It was more than I could say about my own, but I pushed that stabbing pain away for the moment. “They’ll understand. Just tell them you don’t want to be a lawyer anymore.”
Her gaze shot up. “Who the fuck do you think you are to tell me what I do and don’t want? You have no idea what you’re talking about. I can’t just change my mind.”
“Why?” I leaned my elbows on my knees, fixing her with a challenging look. The sun disappeared behind a fat cloud. “You’re eighteen, your whole future in front of you. You have every privilege, every opportunity imaginable. You can literally do whatever the fuck you want, and you’re going to force yourself to follow a path that’s clearly suffocating you?” Did I resent all this? Maybe a little. But I’d also put myself in this situation where my own future was tenuous, so I didn’t really have a right to be upset. I deserved much worse.
“Fuck you, Hendrix. It’s not that simple. I have plans. People expect certain things from me. I’ve put in so much work for this. I . . . it’s . . . you . . . ugh!” She turned away in a huff, breathing hard.
“It’s not worth it, Donna. Trust me. Life’s too damn short.” My hands clenched into fists, and I forced myself to release them. This conversation was making me frustrated and angry too.
She spun to face me once more, her hair flipping. “What would you know about it? God, why do you care? Just leave me alone.”
I didn’t exactly make the decision to tell her my deepest darkest secret, but the conversation had descended into another fight, and I was getting nowhere. She’d shared something pretty big with me in that dark little room—a truth she’d probably never even spoken aloud. Baring my soul to her, even in desperation and anger, almost came naturally.
I pushed off the bench, the nervous energy making it impossible to sit still, and spread my arms wide.
“I fucking killed someone!” I yelled, my horrific truth bouncing off the ancient trees in the park.
Chapter Twenty-One
Donna
I stared at him as his words settled into the cold earth at my feet.
The logical part of my brain was questioning if I should be afraid. He’d been popping up wherever I went, had been demanding to know things about me, had driven me out to a deserted park alone, and then said . . . he told me . . .
I fucking killed someone.
. . . killed someone.
. . . killed . . .
Even as I wondered if I was safe with Hendrix, I struggled to accept the truth of those words. Maybe I hadn’t heard him right.
“I’m sorry, what?” I tried to swallow, but my throat was so dry, so tight.
And yet I wasn’t running from him; my body wasn’t poised to defend itself. Yes, my logical mind had raised all the obvious alarms, but in my gut I knew. Hendrix would never hurt me. Not like that. He wasn’t a threat to my physical safety—just my sanity.
He rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands, then released a massive sigh as he collapsed onto the bench, his body sagging as if he hadn’t slept in a month. “I’m sorry for just dropping that on you like that. I didn’t mean to . . . I never wanted anyone to know, but I need you to understand the whole, abhorrent truth about me—what I am.”
“You’re scaring me.” I wrapped my arms around my middle, but I couldn’t tear my gaze away. I didn’t mean I was worried he’d try to kill me—the very conversation was frightening. I was scared of