like Sarah would do, and then ten minutes later she felt annoyed and angry like Lisa was now, knowing he should be the one contacting her because it was all his fault.
She saw Lisa’s expression change from anger to pity. “I mean after all the weeks you’ve put up with his shitty behaviour he should be round here grovelling on his knees begging for your forgiveness not bloody ignoring you…”
She turned her head away from Lisa struggling to keep control. “I know, and I’ve been making excuses for him all day thinking he could be lying in bed feeling terrible because I’ve walked out.”
Katie could tell by the look on Lisa’s face that this wasn’t likely because suddenly she avoided eye contact and began to pick at the stitching down the seam of her trousers.
Lisa took her hand. “Oh honey, he’s not in the apartment grieving about you because I drove past him this morning turning into the restaurant car park,” she said and began to pat the back of her hand in a clumsy attempt at comforting her.
It didn’t work and Katie swallowed down the tears that were more from embarrassment now than emotional upset. She felt such a fool thinking that he would be too upset to get on with his usual day-to-day life. “Oh God, Lisa, what a first class idiot I really am…”
Lisa switched into full-support mode. “No, you’re not, you are just in utter turmoil so let’s try and get you sorted out,” she said. “I hate seeing you agitated like this and I think it’s time for some action?”
Katie sighed heavily. “Yeah, I think you’re right. He’s had three days to sort himself out and still nothing, which probably means he still can’t see that he’s in the wrong. You know Lisa, if I could just see just a glimmer of my old sweet natured Tim…”
“People change,” Lisa said gravely, “and not always for the better. Believe me I know, I’ve done the leg work.”
Katie smiled shakily at the words. Lisa was working with an American woman and Sarah had been teasing her because she kept using some of her expressions.
Lisa continued. “And you’re convinced this change in him started with the new head chef job? Because if so, then it’s obvious this is the way he reacts to stress. In my experience people usually behave in stressful jobs very differently but after a while they usually quit or find some other way of dealing with it.”
Katie nodded dejectedly. “Yeah, well maybe Tim’s way of dealing with it is by taking it out on me?”
“Hmm, it certainly looks like it. And if he’s not even prepared to talk about it then I suppose it’s up to you now?”
Katie looked at her questioningly. “How come?”
“Well, if it was me I’d start by asking myself some questions,” Lisa said. “Like do I want to go back and try again with a guy who doesn’t even recognise he has a problem, let alone is willing to change? And am I prepared to carry on hoping that in time he’ll revert back to his old self because I still love him and will stick by him no matter what shit he throws at me? Or, do I decide if this is him now, then as much as I loved him, I really don’t want to be with him anymore?”
“Phew!” Katie exclaimed. “I think you’ve just put everything that has been going round and round in my head since Sunday into three simple questions.”
Lisa gulped at her wine and smiled. “It’s not easy. But if you don’t mind me saying I think it’s about time you started to think about yourself and what you really want.”
Katie laid her head back onto the settee and felt the knot of emotion in the back of her throat tighten. “I know you’re right,” she said. “I think I’ve spent so much time worrying and dancing around his moods that I’ve forgotten about me in all of this.”
“Very often the case,” Lisa sympathised. “Feeing confused never helps but at least now we’ve put the problems into some type of order, it might make you feel better?”
“Yes, thanks, it does,” Katie said nodding gratefully. She could just imagine Lisa in her job as she took the emotion out of situations and directly solved problems with big teams of people – she was very impressive.
Lisa refilled their glasses. “So, now we have the questions it’s up to you