and she knows the bare outlines of what’s going on. After Healy was killed, I paid for her to head out to California for a few weeks.”
“It must be hard, living like this.”
He smiled ruefully. “It’s no picnic. I’m a person of interest in a homicide and the people who want you dead surely have the same agenda for me. But I’m not comparing my predicament to yours. I’m truly sorry for all I’ve put you through.”
Ahh, an apology. On the surface at least it sounded heartfelt. She started to move toward the front door, buttoning her coat.
“Well, once you go to the authorities, things will begin to turn around, won’t they?” she said, her back to him now. “You can go back to your old life.”
He came up behind her and turned her around toward him. She felt an electric jolt at his touch.
“One way or the other, my life is never going to be the same again,” he said. “I knew that when I decided to expose the illegal trades. But my situation is different than yours. You will be able to go back to your old life, Kit. It may just take time.”
She said nothing, but he must have detected a look in her eyes.
“What?” he said. “Do you not believe that, or is something else on your mind?”
“It’s just, I don’t know—I love my work, and I want that to thrive. But as for my personal life, I don’t actually want to go back to the way it was.”
“Because?”
“Remember when I came around the corner and saw you talking on the phone at the hotel? You said something I couldn’t get out of my mind: ‘I’d rather have a few regrets than none at all.’ I want to live my life that way for a change.”
“Right, I was talking to Matt then. Is that why you were willing to go to bed with me? Because you didn’t care if there’d be a few regrets?”
“Not exactly,” she said. “That night I was hoping there would be no regrets, that it was something I’d always be glad I’d done.”
Catching her by surprise, he reached up and cupped her cheek. She didn’t flinch, just stood there, finally allowing her face to settle into his hand. He leaned forward and kissed her, softly at first but then more urgently, his mouth seeming to devour her. She let her body relax into his and kissed him back, giving in to the sheer pleasure of it, and hoping she wouldn’t regret it.
chapter 18
Baby was waiting up for her, dressed in a padded, blue silk robe and slippers and sporting, to Kit’s surprise, a head full of pink sponge rollers.
“It’s 10:37,” Baby said, hurrying into the foyer. “I was this close to sending out that disco ball tweet. And then I was going to do another saying you recommend that every kitchen have a row of rooster figurines.”
Kit smiled. “Sorry to be late, but I had a chance to see some of the evidence he has against his old company.”
“And?”
“It reassured me a little—though not completely.”
She recounted the meeting with Kelman, leaving out the part about the kiss. She didn’t want to think about that at the moment—the feel of his mouth on hers, the way she had kissed him back before finally pulling away.
“Do you really buy his reason for waiting?” Baby asked when she was done.
“I’m not sure. I mean, maybe. As of right now, the things he’s told me add up. Of course, looking at all those trading records was about the same as me trying to read Sanskrit. I had to take his word for most of it.”
“You’ll go to the police after he’s approached the U.S. Attorney’s office?”
“Yes, and I’ve been considering what you said about me hiring a lawyer. I do need one. I have a lot of ’splaining to do, as they say.”
“You have to find someone really good, a criminal lawyer.”
“I know, but the only lawyer I’ve ever used is the woman who helped me when I started my business. Offering guidance during a homicide investigation isn’t quite the same as helping someone set up an LLC.”
“Let me ask around, okay? My attorney doesn’t handle criminal—and he’s about as ancient as Matlock—but he’s in a big firm and there may be someone there you can use.”
Kit cringed, thinking of the expense, of the need to reach deep into her savings. But she didn’t have a choice. Her life was on the line.