His hand roamed over my belly. “Bad?” he said in a raspy voice. “Are you sure that’s the word you would use? I think you enjoyed yourself. Could that be bad?”
“Not at all, but you’re not supposed to talk about it,” I said with a laugh.
He rolled on top of me once again. The weight of his body pressed me into the mattress. I never enjoyed being squished but when it was him doing the squishing, it was awesome. “Are you shy?” he asked.
“I am,” I said. I felt my cheeks turning red. “I can’t say I’m skilled at dirty talk.”
“I’ll teach you,” he said and kissed me again.
“I want to learn.”
“I will teach you everything I know because there will be a next time,” he said.
His kisses intensified, and before I knew it, he was riding me again. When we’d both reached a level of satisfaction that left me sated, he asked me to stay the night. I snuggled up against him. “Is this how you normally treat your CPAs?” I teased.
He went up on an elbow and looked down at me. “No,” he said. He was completely serious. “Never. I don’t do this.”
“I would say after that performance, you absolutely do this often enough to be that good at it.”
His cocky smile actually sent shivers down my spine. “I strive for excellence, but that’s not what I meant. I’ve never slept with someone I actually talked to.”
“I have no idea what that means,” I said.
“I mean, you know more about me than anyone else. I opened up to you like I’ve never opened up to anyone else. And then we slept together. That’s new for me.”
I felt so special. I smiled at him. “Thank you. That’s very sweet.”
“No, I’m not sweet. I just wanted you to know this is not a one-time thing for me.”
I wanted to believe him. I could pretend he was being serious for one night. I pushed him to his back and kissed him. Then I lay down with my head on his chest. I closed my eyes and let myself pretend this thing could be real. I wasn’t that naïve. He could say all kinds of flowery things, but I was certain this was not real.
Chapter 28
Nash
Present
I had a moment of clarity. Self-reflection or some psycho-babble nonsense got me to accept I might have been a little hard on Saige and the others. I was frustrated with the lack of progress at the tax firm. I was pissed about the stupid pipes and I was shorter than normal. I was usually able to differentiate between personal stuff and business stuff. Usually. Unfortunately, the stuff with Saige was throwing me off my game.
I felt like I was being pulled in too many different directions. There were things I remembered. Old memories were boiling to the forefront. They’d been buried a long time. I was certain I was long over that crazy time. I was beginning to think I was wrong. My past was coming back to haunt me.
I knew she was a good person. She was one of the first people I ever allowed myself to trust back then. She exuded kindness. After being jerked around by one accountant after another, she was the first one to talk to me like she actually gave two shits about my concerns. She saved my ass back then. She was smart and funny and made me laugh.
“Shit, shit, shit,” I muttered and slapped my hand against the steering wheel. What the hell was I doing? She was making me feel for her. I could not fall for my employee.
“Too late.”
Being with her stirred up all those old feelings. It also brought the sting of regret. I had screwed up back then. I owed her more than an apology for firing the guy.
I had been able to get through the last several years because I never saw her. I was able to bury all of those old feelings and I focused on making millions.
I didn’t see this thing with Saige and I ever getting better if I didn’t make a big effort. I needed to eat crow. Swallow my pride and all the other stuff Davin told me. It wasn’t really what I did, but this felt different. It felt like I needed to change my ways. At least this one time. I would try it Davin’s way and see if it worked. If it didn’t, I wouldn’t do it again.