people their businesses are going to sink in a few months.”
That sounded a little too spot on. “What do you know?”
He laughed. “Not the full story. I just happened to be the lucky guy that got to serve the man you booted out of your office today.”
I held up a finger. “I didn’t kick him out. I walked away after giving him thirty minutes of my very valuable time. I think that was more than generous.”
“That’s not what he said.”
“Why do you listen to that garbage? And why do they come in here and tell you? Do you have some kind of sign up?” I looked around the dark bar to drive home my point.
“As it turns out, you are kind of famous,” he said. “It doesn’t take much to get these guys started. I give them a drink at one o’clock in the afternoon and it’s pretty clear something is on their mind. My job as the bartender is to ask them what that thing is.”
“And you just happen to bring up my name?”
He laughed and shook his head. “Hell no. I don’t dare admit to knowing you. They start complaining about a douchebag named Nash. My favorite is the guy who called you a dick cheese. That one was funny. Bastard and asshole are boring. I like the ones that get creative.”
I sipped my alcohol. “Why are they coming in here and telling you?”
“Because we are the closest bar to your office,” he answered. “You send them packing and they end up here. Been that way for five years. They can’t even get home without a drink after meeting you.”
“I’ve known you for five years,” I said.
He winked. “And I knew you before you ever knew me.”
I scowled. “You never told me that.”
“I don’t tell you everything.”
“Do you tell them you are friends with me?” I asked.
“Tell who?”
“The guys dogging me,” I snapped.
His eyes flashed with amusement. “Hell no. They wouldn’t leave me a tip.”
“So, you just let them talk shit about me?”
He nodded. “Yep. I offer them advice, like a good bartender does. Then I tell them to ignore you and move on. I tell them you are just one asshole and not the be all, end all.”
“With friends like you, I don’t need enemies.”
He smirked. “I think what you mean is, I am your only friend and the enemies’ side is just too full to squeeze me in.”
“I really don’t know why I don’t fire you,” I muttered.
He grinned and reached under the counter again. He filled a glass from the tap and handed it to another customer at the bar. “Because you like me,” he said.
“No, because I think you want me to fire you. You want me to fire you so you can collect unemployment. I’m not going to let you sit on your ass.”
He threw his head back and laughed. “Dammit, you figured me out.”
“You know I did.”
“Why would I want to give up all this?” he said and held up his arms. “My dream job.”
“Very funny,” I said with a shake of my head.
“I think you should pay me extra for all the counseling I must provide to your victims.”
“Please, they could just grow a pair and go back to the drawing board,” I shot back. “I got told no countless times. I never went into a bar and cried about someone being mean to me.”
“Do you want a cookie for being a stud?” he teased.
“I am a stud and don’t you forget it.”
“Are you going to be able to get back out that door tonight? I think your head has grown a good three sizes since you’ve been in here.”
“Do you know I went to a community college?” I asked him as I took another drink.
“Nope. I figured you were one of those Yale hotshots.”
I slowly shook my head. “No. I don’t even have a four-year degree. I went to business school and then dropped out before I could go on. I couldn’t afford it and I figured it didn’t make a lot of sense to start out in debt. I am more of a hands-on guy. I didn’t want or need my father’s help to make it. I paid for my own education, what little I have. I didn’t want anyone to think I owed them anything.”
“I didn’t know,” he said and sounded surprised. “I assumed you were born with a silver spoon in your mouth.”
“A lot of people do, and I don’t bother to tell them any different because